Category Archives: Leadership

The Responsibility of Leaders: Stopping Oppressive Workplaces

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King Solomon, maybe the wisest king of all time, had extraordinary gifts from the LORD.

1 Kings 10:23 tells us that “King Solomon excelled all the kings of the earth in riches and in wisdom.” As time goes along, “the whole earth sought the presence of Solomon to hear his wisdom, which God had put into his mind.”

How did that begin? And why did it end?

Earlier in the book of 1st Kings, the LORD appeard to Solomon in a dream and asked him, “What shall I give you (1 Kings 3:5)?”

Solomon answers in a beautiful expression of humility: he needs wisdom more than anything—to discern between good and evil. He has just become the leader of God’s people, who are numerous, and as a young man he needs God’s wisdom to rule well.

The LORD answers his request and more. He says He will give him both wisdom and, because he didn’t ask for it, riches and honor.

And thus, Solomon begins his reign with wisdom and starts to build a wealthy and powerful dynasty. The LORD tells Solomon that he will be wiser than all who came before and all who come after if he will “walk in my ways, keeping my statutes and my commandments (1 Kings 3:14).”

Blessings and Honor

Seems simple enough. Solomon, like all men, is not a paragon of virtue, but he humbly recognizes his inabilities and depends upon the LORD’s forgiveness and help.

He became wealthy and other leaders looked to him for wisdom including the Queen of Sheba. You get the sense he is the most powerful man in his part of the world. He received honor and glory from all the nations surrounding Israel.

Every one of them brought his present, articles of silver and gold, garments, myrrh, spices, horses, and mules, so much year by year. 26 And Solomon gathered together chariots and horsemen. He had 1,400 chariots and 12,000 horsemen, whom he stationed in the chariot cities and with the king in Jerusalem. 27 And the king made silver as common in Jerusalem as stone, and he made cedar as plentiful as the sycamore of the Shephelah. 28 And Solomon’s import of horses was from Egypt and Kue, and the king’s traders received them from Kue at a price. 29 A chariot could be imported from Egypt for 600 shekels of silver and a horse for 150, and so through the king’s traders they were exported to all the kings of the Hittites and the kings of Syria.

1 Kings 10:25-29 (ESV)

What is the Purpose?

So, in receiving all this blessing from the LORD, what do you think Solomon considered his purpose to be?

Scripture has memorialized his thinking in the form of his poetry. The Psalms are songs for the use in worship. David, his father, who was a great musician wrote nearly half of the 150 Psalms contained in the Bible. But Solomon is also a contributor to the book of worship music.

Psalms 72 gives us insight to how Solomon understood his purpose as a leader:

Give the king your justice, O God,
and your righteousness to the royal son!
2 May he judge your people with righteousness,
and your poor with justice!
3 Let the mountains bear prosperity for the people,
and the hills, in righteousness!
4 May he defend the cause of the poor of the people,
give deliverance to the children of the needy,
and crush the oppressor!

Psalms 72:1-4 (ESV)

What impression do you get as you read his song of praise?

His work as a leader should be like the work of any leader: to provide justice and prosperity for the people. And that includes stopping those who crush others—oppressors.

He goes on to develop the idea in the song:

12 For he delivers the needy when he calls,
the poor and him who has no helper.
13 He has pity on the weak and the needy,
and saves the lives of the needy.
14 From oppression and violence he redeems their life,
and precious is their blood in his sight.

Psalms 72:12-14

There is a distinct focus on caring for those who are struggling to care for themselves—the poor and needy.

What we see in so many leaders is quite the opposite. Their arrogance, narcissism, raging, and image control cause the “oppression and violence” that Solomon decries in his Psalm. Those behaviors and attitudes are opposite of what a good leader is to do and be.

Solomon sounds like the kind of leader I want.

However, it does not end well for Solomon.

The Fall

The LORD does not withdraw His blessing; Solomon scuttles it.

For when Solomon was old his wives turned away his heart after other gods, and his heart was not wholly true to the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father.

1 Kings 11:4 (ESV)

It is hard to believe that once, having tasted such incredible goodness from the LORD, a leader would turn his back on Him. But, in Solomon’s case, he chose to break God’s law in regards to marriage and took on his wives’ idols for his dependance and worship.

His idolatry was expressed in the worship of mythological gods common to his wives and the nations from where they came. It is more likely that a leader in our culture will turn to the gods of wealth, power, fame, and image control rather than a golden artifact. But these are idols nonetheless—things that are trusted in other than the LORD.

Solomon’s legacy ends up being the breakup of the nation into two parts—northern and southern—and continual hostilities between God’s people.

That breakup was brought about by his son who thought the counsel of his buddies to oppress the people was better than the counsel of justice given by older and wiser men. The young men suggested he take control of the people and say to them:

“‘My little finger is thicker than my father’s thighs. And now, whereas my father laid on you a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke. My father disciplined you with whips, but I will discipline you with scorpions.’”

1 Kings 12:10-11 (ESV)

It is evident that Solomon had become a slave-driver—doing quite the opposite of what his Psalm 72 says a king should do. Rehoboam also chose to counter his father Solomon’s psalm.

This was Solomon’s legacy because he rejected the LORD’s good and peace-giving guidance on leadership. He created an environment of injustice, power, and authoritarianism that his son learned at his knee. He allowed all those gifts of wisdom and wealth given by the LORD to create a monster.

For those of us in the West, we have the opportunity to reject such leaders. We have freedoms unknown to many throughout the ages to get free from political, social, spousal, and employment leaders who are narcissistic and destructive.

He has pity on the weak and the needy,
and saves the lives of the needy.

This is our standard for leaders.

Too Close: Lessons from Jonathan on Blindness in Abuse

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I remember hearing the story of an intervention. Fred, the brother of Susan had become an alcoholic and Susan was asked by Fred’s wife to intervene along with a couple of Fred’s brothers. Susan and her brothers lovingly went to Fred. Before they did, a counselor advised them that they would likely become the objects of scorn by Fred’s wife who was asking for the intervention.

It was a strange prophecy. And yet, it came true. Following the intervention—and Fred’s subsequent getting free from his addiction—the small intervention group was disdained by Fred’s wife.

The story was shocking to me. But this is actually a common problem. I have heard similar stories since.

Those who are close to the abuser often fail to see or understand it fully. It makes intervention a difficult and frustrating work even as the addict’s closest friends or family ask for the intervention.

Jonathan, the Example

Jonathan provides one such example, though he proved to truly be a help and solace to his friend David in the end.

In 1st Samuel 20, David had become a hero in Israel, having been wildly successful in his battles with the Philistines. The people would sing songs of praise to him—often comparing him to King Saul:

Saul has struck down his thousands,
and David his ten thousands.

1 Samuel 18:7b

Saul’s jealousy—displayed in chapter after chapter—drives him to madness. Saul is the typical toxic leader. He is one of the very best (worst) examples in Scripture (see here).

In chapter 20, David has once again fled from King Saul. He has been anointed King of Israel, but is not in a place to take the throne. David meets with his best friend, and soul mate, Jonathan and asks him, “What have I done? What is my guilt? And what is my sin before your father [Saul], that he seeks my life?”

Jonathan is agast at David’s question. “Far from it! You shall not die,” he replied. Jonathan cannot imagine his father, Saul doing such a thing and in fact explains he has great confidence that his father would take Jonathan into his confidence if he were seeking David’s life (1 Sam. 20:2).

He cannot see the abuse.

When my wife and I were on the mission field, we were “wined and dined” by our mission leaders for the first several years. We enjoyed meals with the Ambassador (a friend of the mission leaders), trips to an exclusive hotel on the lake, and special praise for the work we were doing.

When others came to us to complain of mistreatment we would pass it off as their inability—just personality differences—to “get along” with the leaders. We didn’t have that problem, so obviously it was primarily the missionary’s fault.

The Test

David pressed the point with Jonathan. So, rather than completely ignore David’s anxiety, Jonathan listened and followed David’s plan to determine if Saul was really toxic.

Jonathan was to attend a multi-day feast with his father and when his father asked where David was, Jonathan was to tell him David was performing sacrifices in his home town of Bethlehem. David was expected to be at the feast and was sure Saul would want to know—since Saul was a toxic leader.

If Saul responded badly, then Jonathan would know that David’s assessment of Saul’s leadership abuse was accurate. The two of them then came up with a plan for getting the results of the test to David covertly.

I want to quote the results in full as it is an extraordinary response by Saul. It is striking that Jonathan didn’t foresee it coming because it is so extreme:

Then Saul’s anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said to him, “You son of a perverse, rebellious woman, do I not know that you have chosen the son of Jesse to your own shame, and to the shame of your mother’s nakedness? 31 For as long as the son of Jesse lives on the earth, neither you nor your kingdom shall be established. Therefore send and bring him to me, for he shall surely die.” 32 Then Jonathan answered Saul his father, “Why should he be put to death? What has he done?” 33 But Saul hurled his spear at him to strike him. So Jonathan knew that his father was determined to put David to death. 34 And Jonathan rose from the table in fierce anger and ate no food the second day of the month, for he was grieved for David, because his father had disgraced him.

1 Samuel 20:30-34

Wow. Really?

Of course, Saul’s threats and emotional abuse are mixed with supposed concern for Jonathan— “neither you or your kingdom shall be established” —but it is shocking to see such horrific abuse. And shocking that Jonathan didn’t seem to have a clue before this event.

The Bite of Betrayal

So too, many who are close to the abusive leader—relatives or employees or CEOs—will fail to see the abuse by choice, self-protection, ignorance, or simply haven’t seen it in action. Until we were the objects of our leaders’ abuses we failed to receive reports of the abuse well. We deeply regret those days and failed counseling attempts.

This is a call to all who name the Name of Christ to hear, receive, and stand by targets of leadership abuse. Though the leader may be a friend or boss or coworker, understand abuse and be willing to see it and call it what it is. Then, do not fight against those who are trying to bring accountability though it may cause you some discomfort.

And to those advocates who receive the brunt of the frustration and hurt from those who are close to the abuser, press on without bearing anger or bitterness. It is a hard place to attempt to stand in the gap and then to be treated badly by those for whom you stood.

It may help to remember two things: It is not uncommon and you can expect some pushback. Secondly, know that the inner circle of the abusive leader may simply need more time to process the destruction their boss has caused. It is not easy to see the forest for the trees.

Give grace and give time. And stand firm.

Fret Not for Vindication: Be Still and Wait Patiently

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Those of us who have faced abusive leadership in the home or workplace know the ever-present desire for validation and vindication. We want others to stand beside us, seeing our hurt, and for the abusive individual to be judged—in either God’s court or human courts.

Like the writers of many of the psalms in Scripture, we can go a long time waiting for either of these outcomes.

King David knew the hatred of men. He spoke of a close friend whose

speech was smooth as butter,
yet war was in his heart;
his words were softer than oil,
yet they were drawn swords.

Psalms 55:21 (ESV)

That one who was intimate with him—he shared in “sweet counsel” with him—was deceptive and hateful.

I am sure that David wanted immediate wrath. He wanted justice done. And yet, he wrote a psalm that pushes pause.

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;
fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,
over the man who carries out evil devices!
8 Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath!
Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
9 For the evildoers shall be cut off,
but those who wait for the LORD shall inherit the land.

Psalms 37:7-9 (ESV)1

Be still.

Fret not.

Refrain from anger.

Wait for the LORD.

It is evident in the psalm that the victim of the wicked will have his day. “. . . there is a future for the man of peace.” But, “transgressors shall be altogether destroyed; the future of the wicked shall be cut off.”

Vindication will come, but now is a time of patience and stillness. We are called to refrain from the debilitating curse of stewing in anger and trust the LORD, who will judge with righteousness.

Not an Easy Task

But of course, saying it does not make it so.

Whoever wrote Psalm 119 knew this:

How long must your servant endure?
When will you judge those who persecute me?

Psalms 119:84 (ESV)

How long? When?

There is no need to beat yourself up over the feelings of hurt, distrust, and impatience. God’s people have from time past suffered the same feelings of dispair. Some of that hurt is encapsalated in God’s Word as an example to us.

Where to Turn

The same writer of Psalms 119 tells us in every verse (except one) that we turn to His Word—in New Testament fulfillment, Jesus—for the healing of those hurts and the patience to endure.

My soul melts away for sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word!

Psalms 119:28 (ESV)

I am melting. But I am God’s child. I am blessed with all the heavenly blessings (Eph. 1:3).

Though I do not feel it at the moment, I know it to be true because Jesus told me so. I can rest in His promise, though I cannot see ten feet in front of me.

Even though the board of directors ignores my plea to bring accountability to the CEO. Even though the church elders do not see the abuse the pastor is heaping upon his flock. Even though the judge fails to take into account the damage my husband has been inflicting upon my soul.

Jesus loves His little children . . . and His justice will prevail.

Be still.

Fret not.

Wait on the LORD.

For the evildoers shall be cut off, but those who wait for the LORD shall inherit the land.

NOTES

  1. For those of you interested in further study in Psalm 37, this is a very good article on the Hebrew of Psalm 37 passed on by a friend of Pearls and Swine: https://tyndalehouse.com/explore/articles/reading-the-psalms-in-hebrew/ ↩︎

What if a Leader were to Boast in Weaknesses?

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Have you ever seen a leader boast in his weaknesses?

First of all, in his job interview he shared all the amazing leadership qualities he possesses and all the victories on the field of organizational management he attained.

And second, all those followers must be given confidence in his acuity and wisdom.

So, what if a leader boasted in his weaknesses?

The Apostle Paul, one of the greatest leaders of the world-wide Christian church said,

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Cor 12:7-9

Paul filled a significant amount of the New Testament with his writing . . . but he never had a press secretary or agent.

We live in a marketing-rich environment. The purveyors of product hype bludgeon us with their images and words through every form of communication—and there are many forms of communication nowadays.

It is taken for granted that even within Christianity, founded upon the testimonies of people like Paul, to reach a world lost in sin our churches and Christian organizations must boast rather in our strengths; our programs, our giving, our service to our communities; it is church-growth 101.

But what if our leaders boasted in their weakness?

Well, then I guess Christ’s strength would rest on them.

Maybe it would show that we are a broken and needy people and that Christ is our Savior in all ways.

It could possibly show that we depend on the One Who created us in His image.

And maybe, in so doing, our LORD would take care of the rest.

Humility

I have written often about humility (here, here, and here). Humility is a key ingredient to good leadership and noticeably lacking in toxic leadership. Humility is necessary if we are to “boast in our weakness.”

In my years of research, interviews, and experience, it is humility that is the game-changer every time. I hear sufferers of toxic leadership use the term or synonyms all the time. It is the difference between a good leader and a bad leader. It is the difference between a toxic leader and a godly leader.

Quite frankly, it is the difference between a pleasant person and a rotten person.

Christopher Hutchinson wrote,

“I believe humility to be at the very heart of Christian faith and even to be the best paradigm of all proper thought regarding God, oneself, and others.”1

Amy Edmondson argues that humility is not something that comes easily for those who are in high positions.2 When looking down on subordinates, receiving their praise and accolades, even the humblest can begin to believe his own press. Christian leadership requires an attitude and action of a servant on behalf of those who are subordinate. Leaders must go beyond their own comfort and needs, setting aside the world’s motivations of ego, money, and pride, as Maxwell notes.3

But “lording it over” others, as Jesus says, is a basic temptation for Christian leaders (Matt. 20:25) as it is for anyone else. Edmondson says, “It can be hard for people to muster both the humility and the genuine curiosity that is needed to really learn from others.”4 It is humility that makes it possible for us to learn, and this is foundational to the work of a team whether on the sports field, in the rehearsal hall, secular corporation, or Christian ministry.

So, what if a leader boasted in his or her weaknesses? What if they gathered up the humility to proclaim their weakness and their need for Jesus Christ? Rather than continually defending themselves and blaming others, our leaders admitted failure and sought forgiveness and reconciliation?

Maybe, “Christ’s strength would rest on” them.

References

  1. Christopher Hutchinson, Rediscovering Humility: Why the Way Up Is Down (Kindle: New Growth Press, 2018), loc. 280. ↩︎
  2. Amy C. Edmondson, Teaming: How Organizations Learn, Innovate, and Compete in the Knowledge Economy, 1st  edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2012), 62. ↩︎
  3. John C. Maxwell, “Reflections on Challenge the Process,” pp. 71–84 in Christian Reflections on The Leadership Challenge, edited by James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner, 1st edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2006), 72. ↩︎
  4. Amy C. Edmondson, Teaming: How Organizations Learn, Innovate, and Compete in the Knowledge Economy, 1st  edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2012), 62. ↩︎

38 Years: Knit Together for a Purpose

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38 years ago today, my wife and I were married.

I was beginning a life as a professional musician and she was in the midst of her teaching career. We had grown up together, “going together” in the sixth grade and again our senior year of high school. We knew each other very well.

We had no clue what lay ahead.

We definately did not believe we would end up in Africa as missionary teachers. Africa was far off the radar for us . . . never, ever wanting to even go there on a vacation.

But then by God’s sovereign grace, He took us there [you can read our story here]. It was a fantastic eight years, but ended in frustration and anger with toxic leadership.

However, that experience, along with the education from a dear, old friend who was suffering from domestic abuse, brought us to where we are today.

The LORD knit us together for this day. The “wife of my youth” is my best friend and partner in seeking justice, healing, and accountablity for those who suffer under toxic leadership in the home, church, and workplace and for their tormentors.

I thank God that we have this ministry together despite our very different gifting and personalities.

I thank the LORD every day for the best wife ever and that I have had 38 years with my best friend at my side, loving me and loving others as she does so well.

God is Good.

Job’s Counselors: The Misuse of Spiritual Influence

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For many the book of Job in the Bible is a pandora’s box of interpretive difficulty.

If you are a black-and-white thinker, it is difficult to read, I imagine.

But Job is a very good place to go to understand more clearly how the counseling of victims of abuse in the home, workplace, or church has gone seriously wrong.

It is helpful to know the beginning and the end before wading into the middle.

In the story of Job—who was horribly tried by Satan at the approval of the LORD—moans in the agony of having lost all his children, his means of income, and is suffering terrible physical ailments.

In the end, his friends are called to account for their poor—sinful—counsel of Job.

So, now we wade into the middle. Because of Job’s suffering, his spiritual counselors are laying one guilt trip after another on him.

In their black-and-white thinking, they believe God blesses those who live righteously and curses those who break His laws. Because Job—who had been richly blessed prior to Satan’s destruction—is suffering horribly, his counselors think he must be cursed by God and therefore he must be living in sin.

Trial = Sin

This is not unfounded in Scripture and why some in their black-and-white beliefs grab and go with it in their thinking and counseling.

In Deuteronomy 28, Moses lays before God’s people the blessings for obedience and curses for disobedience.

For those who obey the LORD:

Blessed shall you be in the city, and blessed shall you be in the field. 4 Blessed shall be the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground and the fruit of your cattle, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock. 5 Blessed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl. 6 Blessed shall you be when you come in, and blessed shall you be when you go out . . . etc.
Deuteronomy 28:3-6 (ESV)

For those who disobey:

Cursed shall you be in the city, and cursed shall you be in the field. 17 Cursed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl . . . etc.
Deuteronomy 28:16-17 (ESV)

It Isn’t So Clear

I use the terms “black-and-white” in a negative way, because when it comes to blessings and curses, Scripture is not as clear on this topic as Deuteronomy 28 would lead you to believe.

It is indeed true that those who reject the LORD in unbelief and arrogance are cursed. But that curse may largely be seen in the judgment they face at the end of life for their rejection of their Creator, not in the middle. This idea is apparent in the story of Lazarus and the rich man (Luke 16:19f) and in multiple places in the Proverbs.

Jesus tells a parable in Luke 16 about the rich man and Lazarus:

“There was a rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and who feasted sumptuously every day. 20 And at his gate was laid a poor man named Lazarus, covered with sores, 21 who desired to be fed with what fell from the rich man’s table. Moreover, even the dogs came and licked his sores. 22 The poor man died and was carried by the angels to Abraham’s side. The rich man also died and was buried, 23 and in Hades, being in torment, he lifted up his eyes and saw Abraham far off and Lazarus at his side.”

Luke 16:19-23 (ESV)

Notice that the rich man, who rejected his God, lived a life of sumptuous feasting every day. On the other hand, Lazarus was a poor man. Yet, the rich man ends up in Hell and Lazarus in Heaven.

We see in Proverbs:

Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity
than a rich man who is crooked in his ways.
Proverbs 28:6 (ESV)

Deuteronomy would lead us to believe—if we don’t look anywhere else—that the “poor” —therefore the suffering—is walking in sin rather than “integrity,” yet Proverbs 28 suggests that it is the “rich man” who is “crooked” —living in sin. How did he get “blessed” if he was disobedient?

But that is the flow of Scripture. There are proverbial statements that in this life are generally true, but the end of the story is where it all leads. The wicked, unbelieving rich man will end up in torment when his life is ended, but torment will possibly only be when that end of life judgment comes.

And conversely, the poor—unblessed in the world’s eyes—will face many trials in this life but in his faithfulness to the LORD be blessed abundently in the judgment. His poverty is not necessarily because of disobedience as we consider the whole of Scripture.

This brings me to Job’s counselors.

Worm Theology

At one point, Bildad, one of Job’s “friends” who was counseling him when he in torment, explained to Job that in his sin, man is a “maggot” or a “worm.”

4 How then can man be in the right before God?
How can he who is born of woman be pure?
5 Behold, even the moon is not bright,
and the stars are not pure in his eyes;
6 how much less man, who is a maggot,
and the son of man, who is a worm!”
Job 25:4-6

In the sense that we are deeply depraved as sinful human beings, wandering about in rebellion and foolishness, Bildad was right. Some complain about “worm theology” but there is biblical truth in it when considering our deep brokenness. Romans 3:9-13 confirms this understanding of man’s depravity.

However, Job’s counselors—not just Bildad—came at Job from a Deuteronomy 28 theology, not a full-on-biblical theology of suffering. This is how many counselors of abuse victims approach those victims. They look for the “fault” in the victim that brought the horrible treatment. They seek to “help” the victim see their own sin and turn from it. They can’t believe a Christian leader could be so sinful as to lie, manipulate, and intentionally crush those under their care.

Abuse is Never the Fault of the Abused

However, these judgments are beyond the purview of biblical counseling.

First of all, abuse victims are never at fault. If the counselor understands the roots of abuse, they will understand that victims never bring it on, but rather the abuser will simply abuse because it is in his heart.

In addition, there are professing Christians who are very depraved and cause incredible destruction.

They will coerce and control in order to fulfill their entitlement in this life. Often they get away with it like the rich man who got his wealth through evil. It seems like they can’t lose, especially to the victim as she sits helplessly by watching the abusive leader convince the board, friends, and stakeholders that he is the good guy in this scenario.

When you receive reports of abuse from a friend, co-worker, or congregant member listen carefully. Stay clear of Christian platitudes like, “You need to give grace. We are all worms and he needs grace just like you do.”

Abuse is not normal relational conflict between husband and wife, boss and subordinate, pastor and deacon, or teacher and student. The conflict is in the heart of the abuser. And never because of the victim’s sin.

Zechariah and Toxic Christian Leadership

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Recently, I was having one of those imaginary discussions. You know, the conversations where your anger ramps up against whom you had a disagreement—though they are not present to actually fight back?

One of the things I stated to my imaginary combatant was, “You are going to tell me that you are doubting the LORD of heaven and earth, Who created you, and could crush you with His pinky?”

All people, everywhere, at all times have been tempted to distrust the LORD—often many times per day. That distrust of God in essence is what drives our trust in ourselves. We, in practice, believe that we can make better decisions, control situations better, and get the job done better than the LORD, even if we would never admit that.

How could we ever presume to be so powerful. There is one God and he can crush us with His pinky.

So too the Israelite leaders—priests and kings and counselors—thought they knew better than the LORD when Zechariah spoke around 500 B.C.

But Zechariah pummeled the Israelite leadership with these words:

“My [God’s] anger is hot against the shepherds,
and I will punish the leaders;
for the LORD of hosts cares for his flock, the house of Judah,
and will make them like his majestic steed in battle.
4 From him shall come the cornerstone,
from him the tent peg,
from him the battle bow,
from him every ruler—all of them together.
5 They shall be like mighty men in battle,
trampling the foe in the mud of the streets;
they shall fight because the LORD is with them,
and they shall put to shame the riders on horses.”

Zechariah 10:3-5 (ESV)

God is angry at the leaders of His people.

So much so, He promises to punish them. This is a common theme among the “minor prophets” of the Old Testament. Prophets like Zechariah were continually calling God’s people to repentance for their evil, often for the way the leaders (more powerful) oppressed the vulnerable (the weaker). The leaders are held to a higher standard throughout Scripture.

How does Zechariah say God will punish these wicked leaders?

He is going to raise up the followers—the house of Judah—to overwhelm the leaders. The humble will overcome the great. The arrogance of the wicked leaders will be judged.

Symbolic Implements of Destruction

Zechariah notes the symbolic implements of destruction as the means by which these subordinates would bring judgment upon the leaders:

  • From him shall come the cornerstone,
  • from him the tent peg,
  • from him the battle bow

Though we see the LORD raise up other nations to drag these leaders into exile, the ultimate fulfillment is found 500 years later through the raising of Jesus—born in the house of Judah—from the dead.

Some commentaries suggest the CORNERSTONE to be symbolic of a ruler or prince. Ultimately, we know that the LORD raised up Jesus Christ to be the true Israelite cornerstone—ruler and prince—and exemplify the leader who brings restoration and healing to the downtrodden Israelites.

However, He does so by also judging the evil of man’s out of control leadership which Israel was experiencing at the time of Zechariah.

Zechariah says the TENT PEG will be brought forth by the LORD. Most suggest this refers to the symbolic purpose of the tent peg:

The allusion is either to a nail, by which the timber in the building is compacted together, and the whole is strengthened, as the church is by Christ: or to a nail to which the cords of tents are fastened, as those of shepherds, travellers, or soldiers; the church is as such a tent . . .

Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

Jesus, the Cornerstone will bring the nation together against these wicked leaders.

However, there may be another interpretation: The allusion may be to Judges 4:21 where Jael, “the wife of Heber took a tent peg, and took a hammer in her hand. Then she went softly to him and drove the peg into his temple until it went down into the ground while he was lying fast asleep from weariness. So he died.”

A wicked king in Canaan, Sisera, was subdued by a “tent-dwelling woman.” So, too it will be a lowly carpenter’s Son [Jesus] who will drive the nail destroying wicked leadership of God’s people (Rev. 20:11f).

And the final implement of war and destruction—of overcoming wicked leadership—is the bow; used as our drones are today to bring down enemies at a distance.

My imaginary conversation came around to the LORD Who can crush me with His little finger. Leaders, in the home or workplace or church, who think they are so powerful to control and suck the life out of their subjects need beware:

The Cornerstone, nail, and bow of the LORD will ultimately destroy those who have been raised up to lead and who have used that privilage and responsibility to oppress God’s people instead of serving them.

Zechariah calls for repentance as all the minor prophets do. Will wicked leaders heed the warning? Will they turn from their wicked leadership before the LORD crushes them with His pinky?

The Sin of [Bystander] Complicity: Toxic Followership in the Workplace

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There are two kinds of complicity in cases of abuse in the workplace or home: The one who gets it but refuses to stand by the victim and the one who refuses to get it and goes along to get along.

Both are wicked because they both have the same effect; they allow a great evil that the LORD continually condemns in His Word.

The Old Testament law was given to lead Israel to love God and neighbor effectively. In Leviticus we have laws that relate to making sacrifice for sins. Through those horribly bloody killings of animals, the Israelites were directed to the fact that their sin brings death . . . and the LORD provided a means for that death to be on something else.

The incredible holiness of God and the brokenness of God’s people were ever on display through those sacrifices.

In Leviticus 5 there is one verse that gives us a hint at the evil perpetrated by those who refuse to testify to the wickedness of another who sins. Often we give all sorts of leeway to bystanders, but the LORD does not. We need to be humbly challenged by His Word:

“If anyone sins in that he hears a public adjuration to testify, and though he is a witness, whether he has seen or come to know the matter, yet does not speak, he shall bear his iniquity . . .”

Leviticus 5:1 (ESV)

“Adjuration” is just a fancy word for a call. It is a sin if you see abusive behavior—which always destroys others—and do not seek accountability for the offending party. You are not free from sin though you did not do the abusive deed. You are doing all you can to allow the evil to continue and God calls this sin.

The Workplace Bullying Institute has done some excellent work since 1997 including the frequent surveying of American businesses and employees regarding toxic workplaces. In their 2021 survey, I found a particular statement fascinating:

The final group to discuss is the one that baffles us most. These are respondents who claim no experience with workplace bullying and do not profess to have an opinion about it. They do not care. We surmise that this 34% of Americans deny its existence. They are the fellow workers likely to turn away when asked to help. Similarly, they are the most likely to blame targeted individuals for their fate. 

Gary Namie, “2021 WBI U.S. Workplace Bullying Survey,” Workplace Bullying Institute (blog), February 24, 2021, http://workplacebullying.org/2021-wbi-survey/.

34% of Americans “turn away when asked to help” when their coworkers or subordinates are being battered by others in the workplace. They are complicit to the evil according to Leviticus 5.

What might interest you further is that the largest group in this particular category of complicit workers also happens to be the most conservative. And you can take that a step further noting that Evangelicals will largely be in that group.

This despite the Word of God teaching that it is sin to stand by while someone is being abused and supporting the abuser rather than the victim. And yet, these people they think they get a free pass.

How can that be?

It can be because it is hard to stand up, particularly when it is a boss who is oppressing his subordinates. And even harder when it is a spiritual authority—pastor or elder—who is crushing his flock with Christiany-sounding words.

Loss of job, fear of “touching the Lord’s anointed (1 Sam. 26:9),” or losing face with important people in the church or workplace drives our misplaced allegiances.

However, we must be directed by the Word of God and the call to love our neighbor as ourself. Love means to care for the vulnerable in these places of toxicity. It means to stand up for them when we see abusive behavior.

I am an empathetic guy and I understand the fears—I have failed in this over and over. So, this blog is as much for me as it is for anyone else.

But there are people all around you dependent on you to stand for truth and answer the adjuration to testify.

Real Change: Peter and Abuse

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As I read 1st Peter I was struck by how helpful his words should be to those who are abusive or have tendencies to be controlling, manipulative, and entitled. Those who struggle with these attitudes and behaviors need to take Peter’s words to heart.

Though there is much detailed work to be done in the text, I want to primarily get to the big picture of Peter’s first chapter, moving into the second.

Paul and Peter are both great at giving us in their writing, by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, the big, beautiful picture first and then moving into the detail of living for Jesus next. They like to provide the “indicatives” first and “imperatives” next, while returning to the indicatives to re-emphasize our place in God’s world and all He has done for us.

They want us to know who we are first and then what we are to do with that knowledge next.

Imperishable

In verse three Peter begins with a beautiful doxology to God’s kindness to his people—those of us who have trusted in his kindness. He has done the work of saving us. He has given us new birth by the raising of Jesus from the dead.

That will never, ever go away. It is unfading . . . it is “imperishable,” he says.

Peter says, even as we go through difficult times—these Christians were going to or were facing great persecutions according to commentators—we can rejoice knowing Jesus wins!

Time for Action

As we come to 1:13, Peter begins to lay before us the call to action that results from this Good News.

It is time to take action. And ultimately this action takes place in the very depths of our soul. It is not simply outward behavior but a complete change of our inward man—mind and heart.

Here Peter quotes, as others in scripture quote, from Leviticus 11:44: “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”

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Some would take this to be “acting good.” And in fact, this is where the abuser lives and breathes. He puts on an act for his church friends and leadership that he is righteous. But deep down, and for those who are under his authority, he breathes fire and hatred and control.

Peter doesn’t allow for this. Though he begins this passage with what sounds like outward appearances, he doesn’t stay there. He moves forward, digging down deep within our hearts.

22 Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart . . .

Notice the terms Peter uses: sincere, love, pure heart. Every one of those terms involves the inner man, not simply outward behavior. He has talked about “conducting” ourselves which is decidedly behavioral.

But he doesn’t stop there.

Not An Act

In Greek, sincere means “unfeigned.” It is not an act but what we really desire. We are not handing a cup of water out while thinking to ourselves, “I can’t stand this guy.”

Abusive leaders are almost always acting a part. They desire to look good to the watching world. This is why reporting (whisteblowing) is nearly always difficult and often unproductive. Those who hear the report rarely believe it. What they have seen and heard is that the pastor, manager, CEO, or coordinator is wonderful and has a heart of gold. He is skilled at his job. He radiates goodness.

This is what makes Jesus’ use of the term “white-washed tombs” so apropos. The tomb looks good on the outside with newly painted walls, but inside it is rotting fresh. So too, the toxic leader.

Put Away All Evil

All of this is driving to chapter 2 where Peter says,

So put away all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander.

1 Peter 2:1

Put away all the evil. If you abuse your authority—authority given by God to be used for his glory and other’s good—it is time to repent. Let’s look at these words Peter uses.

  • Malice: “Ill-will, desire to injure.” Maybe from jealousy (see below) or competitivesness you are seeking the downfall of someone subordinate or senior. You desire their demise.
  • Deceit: You are faking it. You don’t really care about those under your care or ministry even though you say you do. You just want to be in control and the top dog. In order to hold your place of prominence or to get ahead you lie and act.
  • Hypocrisy: “The acting of a stage player.” Closely related to deceit, you are acting one way while your heart is in another place. You maybe even use some outward humility if it gets you some attention for which you deeply long. But inside it is just an act.
  • Envy: You are not so much concerned about God’s glory but rather your own. When others get some attention, you seek to diminish it rather than encourage it. The narcissist runs on this.
  • Slander: This is your means of getting all that glory. “The act of damaging the good character of someone.” You tear them down; put them in their place. You explain, “She just isn’t that committed to the organization.” That way you look better and she must be lying about your toxicity.

If these describe your leadership “style,” it’s time to confess that you are a white-washed tomb.

It is time to do the difficult work of self-awareness; to ask the lord to show you how you have taken his good gifts and used them to destroy and hurt others rather than build up (Ephesians 4:11-13).

Unfortunately, the vast majority of toxic leaders will not listen to Peter, Paul, Jesus, or anyone but themselves. But, if any of this rings true to you of your heart, you are on the road to “recovery” having the humility it takes to repent.

Jesus seeks such ones as these to mold into the leaders He desires in His kingdom.

Abuse in the Bible: But Does it Even Use That Word?

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I have heard periodically that the Bible does not include the term, “abuse.”

However, I am not sure from where that idea came. There are a number of places that the translation of Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic words can be and are accurately understood to mean “abuse.”

In addition, language scholars instruct that it is abuse in much the same way we would define emotional, psychological, and spiritual abuse in our world of toxic leadership.

Matthew narrates the story of Jesus giving a sermon on, what has become known as, the Mount of Beatitudes. There Jesus uses the term rhaká (ῥακά) which means, according to the Theological Dictionary of the New Testmament,1 “blockhead or fool.”

But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.

Matthew 5:22 (ESV)

According to Kittel, the author of the TDNT, the word comes from the Aramaic term for abuse. He says, “The Aramaic term expresses disparagement accompanied by anger and contempt. Addressed to the foolish, thoughtless, or presumptuous person, it means ‘blockhead,’ and is the most common term of abuse in Jesus’ day.”

Kittel goes on to say that the sins of the tongue are very serious in God’s eyes: they are put on a par with murder.

In addition he says, “In the world of Jesus injury by words is of the utmost seriousness.”

Luke

Luke also records one of Jesus’ sermons in chapter 6 of his book. Here Jesus says,

“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”

Luke 6:27-28 (ESV)

The Greek term “epēreazō (ἐπηρεάζω)” means in English to “insult, to treat abusively, use despitefully, to revile, in a forensic sense to accuse falsely, and to threaten.”

Proverbs

The wise king Solomon noted,

Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out,
and quarreling and abuse will cease.

Proverbs 22:10 (ESV)

The ESV translates the Hebrew term qâlôn (קָלוֹן) as abuse. That word means “shame, disgrace, dishonour, ignominy” according to Strongs Dictionary.

This is exactly as we understand emotional, psychological, or spiritual abuse.

Paul

Paul, in his second letter to Timothy tells the young pastor,

But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.

2 Timothy 3:1-5 (ESV)

When the ESV says “abusive,” it is translating the Greek word, “blasphēmos” (βλάσφημος). You probably recognize the word. When we talk about blaspheming against the Lord, this is the word we are using.

It means, “speaking evil, slanderous, reproachful, railing, abusive.” Very strong terms for words used against others.

Summary

Hopefully you get the idea that indeed, Scripture does use words for abuse and it gives abusive words great weight.

The brother of a friend of ours expressed his frustration with his sister’s difficulty with an abusive husband by saying, “It’s a damn load.” He was put out by the relational damage but not very empathetic for what she was going through. He was only really concerned about the disruption in his own life.

This is what the sinful rebellion of God’s creatures brings about . . . a damn load. Abuse is a horrible sin and it is extraordinarily destructive.

  1. Ronald Pitkin, Theological Dictionary of the New Testament, ed. Gerhard Kittel and Gerhard Friedrich, Abridged edition (W. B. Eerdmans, 2006). ↩︎