Tag Archives: humility

The Effective Leader: Temperance, Empathy, and Humility

Posted on by
2

A friend of mine says, “Leadership is easy when things are easy. But real leadership happens when things are difficult.”1

It is in those challenging times that the real heart of the leader becomes evident. All sorts of airs can be put on when everyone is getting along, the production is going strong, relationships are amicable.

However, when the leadership is challenged or anxiety in the organization is high—then leadership becomes. . . leadership.

Seven Sentences

Paul, in his letter to the Roman church, provides in seven (English) sentences a beautiful summation of how all people are to engage others—and how leaders should understand their own approach to leadership.

Paul says,

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. 17 Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. 18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.

Romans 12:14-18 (ESV)

There are three character traits invaluable to the leader’s ministry to others:

  • Temperance.
  • Empathy.
  • Humility.

Temperance

The first thing Paul says, and similarly two other times, is to be peaceful.

This goes against so much of what is touted of leadership. Leaders are often expected to be brash, bold, uncompromising, and aggressive. Our political leaders have raised the rhetoric of leadership to new heights of anger, arrogance, and falsehood. Many tout such behavior as “leadership”.

It gets attention and many leaders now think this is appropriate, and even good.

However, Paul says in four different ways that we are not to fight back against those who criticize, live in harmony, and be at peace.

There are times when criticism comes that needs an answer. Scripture is also concerned with truth-telling and accuracy of information (not bearing false witness). And this is why we can say that Christians are not to be doormats—seeking peace does not always mean giving in.

But the leader needs to carefully weigh the wisdom in responding to attacks from subordinates or their stakeholders. And particularly, he/she needs to weigh his/her words carefully to be sure they are full of grace. Often what is taken as persecution is really just well-aimed criticism that is hard to take.

Leaders must always remember that those attacking—or simply exhorting—are bearers of the image of God. As such, they should be treated with care, respect, and honor.

The biblical expectation of the leader is to be “sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable . . . not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome” (1 Timothy 3:2-3) as Paul explains to Timothy regarding Elders in the church. These are all words that describe a temperate person—one who is not easily riled.

I remember hearing of a 19th Century preacher who when it was suggested he stand up against the unmerited attacks of others—which he didn’t—said, “If they really knew how bad I am it would be even worse.”

Here was a temperate leader.

Empathy

Empathy has been attacked by Christian and non-Christian alike as an inadequate way to engage others while they are suffering. Being empathic may squelch saying what might need to be said.

However, Christians cannot jump on that bandwagon. Though there are cautions, Scripture is replete with examples of empathic engagement (see 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 especially). Paul says here, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”

The point of that little statement is to encourage feeling what the other is feeling. “Rejoice” is an heart attitude. It is an emotion. Weeping comes from the heart as well. These are both emotions based on the emotions of the person with whom we are engaging.

The leader—and all of us—are called to empathize with those under our oversight. If we do this we will refrain from trying to “control” the person in unhelpful ways. It will help the leader consider carefully his responses, policies, and care for his subordinates.

Humility

In the middle of verse 16, Paul takes a shot at arrogance. He says,

“Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.”

Remember when in elementary school someone who associated with poor and unpopular kids would be derided? The disdain heaped upon the poor kid would be directed at those who would give aid or comfort?

The Christian leader is called to take special care of those who are on the bottom rungs of their social ladder. It takes additional effort for those in high positions to do this.

And it takes a humble view of self.

All a leader needs to do is recognize his equal place before God among all, what he may consider, the riff-raff of life (Galatians 3:28) . In God’s reality, the leader is of no greater importance than the lowest paid, least esteemed subordinate in his organization.

Just a look at one’s heart should help humble the leader. He may outwardly gain all sorts of notoriety, but when considering his own failures—that no one sees—he should be able to humbly engage those down the ladder.

Learn from the World?

Leaders tend to learn from the world. The world might teach arrogance, control, and manipulation. But the Christian leader has a higher calling.

God calls you to temperance, empathy, and humility.

NOTES

  1. Dr. Anders Örtenblad, Professor of Working Life Science, University of Agder, Norway.  ↩︎

What if a Leader were to Boast in Weaknesses?

Posted on by
Reply

Have you ever seen a leader boast in his weaknesses?

First of all, in his job interview he shared all the amazing leadership qualities he possesses and all the victories on the field of organizational management he attained.

And second, all those followers must be given confidence in his acuity and wisdom.

So, what if a leader boasted in his weaknesses?

The Apostle Paul, one of the greatest leaders of the world-wide Christian church said,

Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Cor 12:7-9

Paul filled a significant amount of the New Testament with his writing . . . but he never had a press secretary or agent.

We live in a marketing-rich environment. The purveyors of product hype bludgeon us with their images and words through every form of communication—and there are many forms of communication nowadays.

It is taken for granted that even within Christianity, founded upon the testimonies of people like Paul, to reach a world lost in sin our churches and Christian organizations must boast rather in our strengths; our programs, our giving, our service to our communities; it is church-growth 101.

But what if our leaders boasted in their weakness?

Well, then I guess Christ’s strength would rest on them.

Maybe it would show that we are a broken and needy people and that Christ is our Savior in all ways.

It could possibly show that we depend on the One Who created us in His image.

And maybe, in so doing, our LORD would take care of the rest.

Humility

I have written often about humility (here, here, and here). Humility is a key ingredient to good leadership and noticeably lacking in toxic leadership. Humility is necessary if we are to “boast in our weakness.”

In my years of research, interviews, and experience, it is humility that is the game-changer every time. I hear sufferers of toxic leadership use the term or synonyms all the time. It is the difference between a good leader and a bad leader. It is the difference between a toxic leader and a godly leader.

Quite frankly, it is the difference between a pleasant person and a rotten person.

Christopher Hutchinson wrote,

“I believe humility to be at the very heart of Christian faith and even to be the best paradigm of all proper thought regarding God, oneself, and others.”1

Amy Edmondson argues that humility is not something that comes easily for those who are in high positions.2 When looking down on subordinates, receiving their praise and accolades, even the humblest can begin to believe his own press. Christian leadership requires an attitude and action of a servant on behalf of those who are subordinate. Leaders must go beyond their own comfort and needs, setting aside the world’s motivations of ego, money, and pride, as Maxwell notes.3

But “lording it over” others, as Jesus says, is a basic temptation for Christian leaders (Matt. 20:25) as it is for anyone else. Edmondson says, “It can be hard for people to muster both the humility and the genuine curiosity that is needed to really learn from others.”4 It is humility that makes it possible for us to learn, and this is foundational to the work of a team whether on the sports field, in the rehearsal hall, secular corporation, or Christian ministry.

So, what if a leader boasted in his or her weaknesses? What if they gathered up the humility to proclaim their weakness and their need for Jesus Christ? Rather than continually defending themselves and blaming others, our leaders admitted failure and sought forgiveness and reconciliation?

Maybe, “Christ’s strength would rest on” them.

References

  1. Christopher Hutchinson, Rediscovering Humility: Why the Way Up Is Down (Kindle: New Growth Press, 2018), loc. 280. ↩︎
  2. Amy C. Edmondson, Teaming: How Organizations Learn, Innovate, and Compete in the Knowledge Economy, 1st  edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2012), 62. ↩︎
  3. John C. Maxwell, “Reflections on Challenge the Process,” pp. 71–84 in Christian Reflections on The Leadership Challenge, edited by James M. Kouzes and Barry Z. Posner, 1st edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2006), 72. ↩︎
  4. Amy C. Edmondson, Teaming: How Organizations Learn, Innovate, and Compete in the Knowledge Economy, 1st  edition (San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass, 2012), 62. ↩︎

Humility. Humility. Humility.

Posted on by
2

There is no place for arrogance. Or entitlement.

Common to the abuser of power in the home, church, organization, or workplace is a sense of entitlement.

Recently, I have been enjoying “The Crown,” a TV series about Queen Elizabeth and the monarchy in Britain. It is fascinating.

It is apparent that the royalty has enjoyed good and humble servants to the people. And it has suffered with arrogant and entitled snobs. These have been a burden to the common people.

Scripture gives no leeway to those who think they are particularly important. The Lord of Hosts does not take kindly to the arrogant. God does not give a hoot for those that think they deserve all the spoils of this life including wealth, honor, or comfort and will do whatever is necessary to gain them.

When David was saved from his enemies (and the wicked King Saul), he wrote a song saying,

You save a humble people,
but your eyes are on the haughty to bring them down.

2 Samuel 22:28 (ESV)

This is the consistent theme in scripture. God saves humble people. But He judges those who are puffed up with their own importance.

He has shown strength with his arm;
he has scattered the proud in the thoughts of their hearts;
he has brought down the mighty from their thrones and exalted those of humble estate

Luke 1:51-52 (ESV)

It is the Lord’s work in their hearts. They are born arrogant and self-serving, but by the grace of God, they are made to humble themselves to serve Him.

The arrogant are easy to spot.

  • They think they have all the answers.
  • They see themselves as better than everyone around them: smarter, better looking, more important.
  • They seek control of those who come up against them often in ruthless and shocking ways: angry outbursts, manipulation, isolation, firings.
  • They blame others for their own failures or feelings.
  • They never ask for help. Never acknowledge weakness.
  • They talk a lot about how others need to submit to their authority. They rely on that authority rather than on practicing good and humble leadership.
  • They talk a lot about how special their organization, family, church, or business are. Much more special than any other.
  • They do not respond to criticism: they get angry, justify, ignore…

These are just a few listed by experts in the field of leadership. [see the P&S Resources page]

It is not uncommon for those caught under such oppressive leadership to wonder if the leader is even a Christian. Their behavior seems so antithetical to Christ.

It is a question that cannot be answered in this life by God’s created beings.

The Editor of Pearls and Swine spent eight years on the mission field in Africa. His family learned much about family, community, leadership, and God’s work around the world. Read their stories.

To Africa On a Lark: A Visitor Brings a Sharp Razor

But, in the process of church discipline as described in Matthew 18, the church is to consider the unrepetant “as a Gentile and a tax collector.” This has normally been understood to mean, “treat him as a unbeliever.”

Note, he is to be seen (or treated) this way. Our judgment may be incorrect but the arrogant is clearly not following the Lord and cannot have assurance of salvation. And, the church should not give him or her that assurance.

For the humble leaders…there is much assurance and encouragement found in scripture.

He leads the humble in what is right,
and teaches the humble his way.

Psalm 25:9 (ESV)

The LORD lifts up the humble;
he casts the wicked to the ground.

Psalm 147:6 (ESV)

Are you under the tyranical hand of a toxic leader? A “mocker,” as Dan Allender (and Proverbs) calls them?

Be assured that the Lord will, in time, lift you up and cast the arrogant to the ground.

Are you a tyranical or toxic leader? Turn to the Lord. Trusting in Him and repentance are your only assurance of His saving work in your life.

 

Good Leadership Gone Bad

Posted on by
Reply

How difficult is it for Christian leaders to end well? I will try not to be too cynical.

Many years ago, I attended a young adults retreat. The speaker shared with the ragtag group of college students gathered at Fort Huachuka army base that the odds are against finishing well as Christians. I don’t remember the statistics, but the warning was clear. Many Christians start their walks with the Lord with passion but the worries and cares of the world turn their hearts over the years.

Among leaders the statistics may be even more discouraging. How many leaders who start with godly desires to lead with integrity end up toxic? I am pretty good at making up statistics but won’t here.

Asa, King of Judah

Asa, the king of Judah around the turn of the 9th Century BCE, began with a noble commitment to leading Judah under the authority of Yahweh. It is written in 2 Chronicles 14:1-12 that, “Asa did what was good and right in the eyes of the Lord his God.”

Asa, with great zeal, cleared out the worship of false gods in the land. Even the “high places,” locations of worship not sanctioned by the Lord, were taken down despite often apparently justified by Judah’s leaders as places making the worship of Yahweh more accessible.

Then, more than a million fighting Ethiopians came up against Judah and Asa sought the Lord to save Judah. He knew his strategizing and smaller army could not possibly defeat such a great force.

And Asa cried to the Lord his God, “O Lord, there is none like you to help, between the mighty and the weak. Help us, O Lord our God, for we rely on you, and in your name we have come against this multitude. O Lord, you are our God; let not man prevail against you.” 

2 Chronicles 14:11

Asa recognized his need. He recognized he did not have the power. Asa recognized God was the One on Whom Judah needed to rely. He knew Yahweh in reality ruled Judah, not himself.

Those are not the responses of a toxic leader who must make all things about himself.

God, in response, saved Judah from the hand of Ethiopia. Scripture does not even tell us how. It simply states that “the Lord defeated the Ethiopians before Asa and before Judah, and the Ethiopians fled.”

A chapter later in 2nd Chronicles, a prophet came to Asa and further encouraged him to stay the good course. The prophet explained that Asa was unique among Judah’s kings as he had turned the nation to the Lord. He had led Judah well. Azariah not only encouraged Asa in his past leadership but exhorted Asa to continue:

The Lord is with you while you are with him. If you seek him, he will be found by you, but if you forsake him, he will forsake you.

2 Chronicles 15:2

Keep it up, Asa. You can hear the tone of Azariah’s voice even. Go get ’em, Asa. Attaboy.

All that begins well…

But one chapter later, we see King Asa turning and the hand writing is on the wall.

The northern kingdom, Israel, determined to make Asa and his nation’s life miserable. Asa inexplicably turned elsewhere for help. He did not turn to the Lord despite Yahweh defeating the Ethiopian army, over a million strong, before his eyes.

What could have happened? Why did Asa turn to Syria when he had seen the Lord in action in a mighty way? Why did Asa not turn to the Lord who had proven Himself faithful when up against overwhelming odds before?

The words he would hear from a seer were not the encouraging words he heard before from Azariah.

Hanani, the seer, came to Asa king of Judah and said to him, “Because you relied on the king of Syria, and did not rely on the Lord your God, the army of the king of Syria has escaped you. Were not the Ethiopians and the Libyans a huge army with very many chariots and horsemen? Yet because you relied on the Lord, he gave them into your hand.”

2 Chronicles 16:7-8

This was bad. Judah would now be at war constantly the seer told him. Many lives would be lost because Asa refused to rely on the Lord, instead turning to men. Maybe Asa had a moment of weakness. All of us do. We all rely on ourselves or other men (women) at some point…often many points.

But it appears worse than that. Asa’s heart would be laid bare as he responds to Hanani.

Then Asa was angry with the seer and put him in the stocks in prison, for he was in a rage with him because of this. And Asa inflicted cruelties upon some of the people at the same time.

2 Chronicles 16:10

Not only does he punish the seer for telling him the truth, he turned on his own people. Scripture does not tell us what exactly Asa did to “some of the people” but it should be evident that his faithlessness had a deep impact on his leadership.

He would become toxic as he rejected God’s “headship” over his reign.

As he failed to love God, not trusting Him with leadership, he would fail to love man. He would become an abusive leader. This is the way of the toxic leader.

In Asa’s final years as King, he got some form of disease in his feet. Chronicles tells us that it became “severe.” What should have been his response? Unfortunately, it was not that. He did not rely on the Lord as he had early in his reign.

And Asa died.

It did not end well.

What are the lessons for leaders? Leaders need several things to keep them strong. And all of them are seen as weaknesses by the world:

  • Daily reliance on the Lord to mature and strengthen his leadership skills.
  • Daily recognition that the Lord is the true Leader of the organization or business or church…not him.
  • Reliance on subordinates to advise and challenge his failures.

Each of these requires humility. Humble yourself under the mighty hand of God and in His time He is the One who will exalt you.

And when exalted…remember where it came from.

To Africa On a Lark

a book by Pearls And Swine’s Editor

The editor of Global Missiology writes of To Africa On a Lark:. “extremely readable, with an easy to follow flow. The stories are quite engaging…The overall theme of cross-cultural adjustment, with the ‘razor’ image, comes through clearly.” 

Read your free preview here: