Recently, a fellow author and researcher shared an article with me written critically of his work in the area of toxic leadership.
There was one paragraph that was fundamental to the journalist’s criticism:
In Sweden, trust in the immediate manager is at a record high. Almost seven out of ten professionals between the ages of 21 and 65 have a great deal of trust in their immediate manager. 58 percent also agree that they have a great deal of trust in their company’s management team. This is shown by Kantar Sifo’s ORVESTO Business 2020 survey, in which almost 15,000 people participated.
This is good and bad news. The writer’s view is that my friend was much too critical of leadership. In essence, the criticism was based on the journalist’s view that the researcher found a toxic leader under every rock.
When my friend and I talked about it, we shared a laugh—and this is why:
Maybe Not Every Rock
Clearly, according to the survey/study done in Europe—where my friend is Professor of Working Life Science at the University of Agder and editor of multiple important international works on leadership—bad leadership is not under every rock.
Only 42% of those surveyed don’t trust their company’s management team.
The way you frame that statistic makes all the difference. Will you allow me to interpret that statistic as saying bad leadership is not under every rock—but nearly every other one?
This reminds me of the criticism leveled at the many bloggers and researchers who are bringing to light toxic leadership in Christian organizations by a seminary professor several years ago—see this blog I wrote about his arguments.
I would like to share some further statistics that might help frame this important debate.
The Statistics are Overwhelming
According to the Toxic Workplace, 64% of those who responded to a survey were working with a toxic personality and 94% had experienced a toxic boss.
According to Balda, approximately one third of workers in the US have been bullied at work and three quarters of those were bosses.
“The Star-Telegram conducted an investigation that uncovered at least 412 allegations of sexual misconduct in 187 independent fundamental Baptist churches and other affiliated institutions spanning 40 states and Canada” (Christianity Today, December 2018).
“Nearly one in five workers—the study calls “disturbingly high” —say they face a hostile or threatening environment at work, which can include sexual harassment and bullying” (LA Times).
Depending on the estimation method, between 33.5% and 61% of all respondents [of a Gallup survey] report their immediate superiors as showing some kind of consistent and frequent destructive leadership during the last six months…” (Aasland et al. 2010, p. 446 in Debating Bad Leadership – Anders Ortenblad).
It is estimated that approximately the same percentage of psychopaths run corporations as are incarerated in our prisons.
Costly financially, spiritually, and personally.
A book called Mean Men took a poll of 800 managers and employees in 17 industries and found:
48% intentionally decreased their work effort.
47% intentionally decreased the time spent at work.
38% intentionally decreased the quality of their work.
80% lost work time worrying about the incident.
63% lost work time avoiding the offender.
78% said that their commitment to the organization declined.
12% said that they left their job because of the uncivil treatment.
The book also noted that toxic managers turn away talented potential employees.
The annual cost of toxic leadership in the Department of Defense (US) is $4.7 billion.
One of my interviewees years ago explained the impact her toxic pastor had on her as an employee. She described migraines and sleepless nights. It took years for her to heal from the experience.
Others of my interviewees have either left the church or are inhabiting the margins due to their distrust after having faced such horribly abusive church leaders.
So, these toxic leaders may not be under every rock . . .
but there sure are a lot of them.
The Ad Interim Study Committee on Domestic Abuse and Sexual Assault of the Presbyterian Church in America noted in one of the Myths of Abuse,
“Abuse is not rare. Over half of murdered women were killed by a current or former partner. Approximately one in four women and one in seven men have been victims of intimate partner abuse. In 2019, the Department for Health and Human Services reported that 656,000 children were confirmed by state agencies as victims of abuse, a national rate of 8.9 per 1,000 children. Another study estimates that 37% of children will have a visit from local child protective services by the time they turn 18. By extrapolating these data, we estimate that between 6% and 10% of children will be state-confirmed victims of child abuse by the time they turn 18. Since many instances of abuse go unreported, the actual rate of child abuse is likely far higher.” http://www.DASACommittee.org
Because it led to one of the greatest events in all of human history. The resurrection of Jesus for the rescue of mankind.
But have you ever considered what brought on the darkness of this day that leads to that day?
Toxic Leadership.
It is actually quite simple, but it wasn’t until my friend Anders Örtenblad pointed it out to me this week.
Our focus over the Easter weekend, of course, is on what Jesus Christ, who walked the earth about 2000 years ago, did in going willingly to a tortuous death—one that is unparalleled in history. But what happened to bring that about?
Jesus entered Jerusalem the Sunday before His arrest by the Jewish and then Roman authorities to shouts of praise and the waving of tree branches—the sign of a conquering hero returning from battle. This image is also played out in that Jesus heads to the Temple (Mark 11:13) which the hero would do to give sacrifice to the people’s gods. Of course, He would sacrifice Himself for the sins of the people at the end of the week.
But what brought about His death and sacrifice was the interaction of multiple kinds of toxic leadership: Pilate (the Roman authority), Judas (an Apostle), and the Jewish Sanhedrin. Religious leaders and civic leaders.
Each of these leaders practiced a different kind of leadership that is ultimately destructive.
The Apostle:
Judas was one of the original Apostles, chosen by Jesus Christ as a messenger to the world of the Good News of God’s redemption of his World. In essence he could be compared to a “middle-manager,” having an authority higher than himself and at the will of that authority (Jesus).
It appears in Scripture that he particularly focused on wealth (John 12:4). Money drove his toxic leadership (Matthew 26:14).
In this passage in Matthew, Judas went to the Jewish ruling council (Sanhedrin) and asked them, “What will you give me if I deliver him over to you?” They gave him 30 pieces of silver for his task of turning on his boss, One who happened to be absolutely righteous and holy, and the best boss one could ever hope for.
Incredible?
Yes, but the evil in man can drive those who seek wealth or comfort or fame to do some incredible things. And when in leadership, their destruction can be overwhelming to others.
Jewish Sanhedrin:
The Jewish council paid Judas to inform on Jesus and they went to arrest Him in the garden where He was praying. According to scholars, the council broke a long list of their own rules to arrest Jesus and try Him on false charges, demanding that the Roman authorities execute Him.
Why would they go to such extreme measures? Competition.
They were jealous of the competition that Jesus was giving them. Jesus had continually challenged their holier-than-thou attitudes and actions, many of their teachings that were unbiblical, and in turn their authority among the people (Matthew 23:1-12, 23; Mark 5:7-13).
They wanted to wipe out the competition. The competition was taking away their authority before the people that they had lorded over them and enjoyed.
So they brought trumped up charges just like leaders we see now in religious, civic, and organizational/business environments. They sought any way possible to destroy their competition.
Pilate, the Roman Authority:
Finally, we see Pilate, who at one point recognizes the innocence of Jesus though the Sanhedrin had argued vehemently for Jesus’ conviction. Pilate seems to waver and suggests to the crowds that Jesus be traded out for a truly guilty prisoner. But the crowd, stirred up by the Jewish leaders, makes their wishes known all the more.
In the end, Pilate is a victim of his people-pleasing attitude and simply goes for the easy rather than right decision.
There may be more leaders like Pilate than are like the others. However, those who refuse to be under Jesus’ rule and would rather do what makes others under their authority happy, even if wrong and destructive, create chaos and suffering for those same people in the end.
At the End of the Day
All of this toxic leadership brings about the conviction and execution of a completely innocent man—the God of the universe.
That should be shocking and confusing and angering to all. There should not be a dry eye in the house.
However, at the end of the day, or should I say weekend, Jesus Christ, who was dead and buried, rose from the dead in glory.
He ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father.
He will come again to judge the living and the dead.
That judgment will mean life and wholeness and peace to all who call upon his name, rejecting the toxic leadership of Judas, the Sanhedrin, and Roman authority, and turning to Him in faith.
I would like to share with you a new spiritual abuse support group that my friend, Aaron Hann is starting. Aaron is a counselor and has had much success in helping survivors of spiritual abuse and religious trauma find healing.
Below is information and a link to his video describing this group. Here are the basics:
What: 24-week virtual support group for survivors of spiritual abuse and religious trauma.
When: Daytime CST (most likely Mondays or Fridays)
Tentative start date: TBD (Hopefully by March 2026 depending on interest)
You can read this or watch Aaron’s video, it’s the same content. This will take you to Aaron’s Substack site which is also a wonderful resource.
Scattered and Found
The name Scattered and Found comes from John 10:12 (where the wolf scatters the sheep) and John 9:35 (where Jesus finds the healed blind man who had been scattered). This group is a bit different from other short-term support groups, and I’m going to take some time to explain what it is all about. If you or someone you love might benefit from a group like this, I think the time to read or listen is worth it. It will help you decide if this group might be a good fit. I believe it can provide unique help to survivors struggling to reconnect with faith and spiritual community.
Why Support Groups?
One of the most painful realities in religious trauma healing is a paradox: we need community to heal; but community is what harmed us and thus feels dangerous. So how can we heal? One helpful avenue is through a support group of fellow sufferers who share your specific pain. While it doesn’t alleviate all of the reasonable doubts and fears, it often feels safer to heal alongside others healing from the same or similar experience. “Safety is the treatment,” and I put safety first in the designs for this group.
A Book and a Group
Scattered and Found is a support group, but specifically it is a book group, and so it has two elements: a book, and a group. I’m going to explain them in that order, but please don’t mistake the order for priority. The group is just as important as the book, and in some respects, more so. One can engage a book, even a book of the Bible, in isolation. Not so with a group.
The Book
This group is centered on a slow reading of the Gospel of John, for a very important and perhaps surprising reason: John was written for Christians suffering from trauma caused by religious abuse and oppression. There are many ways of explaining this. The quick version is that the group of Jewish believers for whom John was written, often known as the Johannine Community (ie the community of John), were kicked out of the Jewish synagogue and the entirety of their Jewish community because of their belief in Jesus. While there are many layers to this—ethnicity, culture, politics, and religion—it is the religious component that makes John especially relevant for religious trauma survivors in any setting.
I’m going to share just a few places in John’s narrative that give us glimpses of the traumatic experiences of the Johannine community. If you join this group, you will see even more of these signs of God speaking directly to your traumatic experiences and God’s healing grace. But since this theme is probably new, I don’t want you to just take my word for it. I’m reading these without explaining any story context; just pay attention to themes of fear, violence, conflict, and trauma.
First, there are repeated mentions of excommunication and the threat of religious persecution, notably, not from people of other faiths (ie Roman authorities), but from those who shared the same Jewish faith:
John 9:22 His parents said these things because they were afraid of the Jews, since the Jews had already agreed that if anyone confessed him as the Messiah, he would be banned from the synagogue.
John 9:34-35 “You were born entirely in sin,” they replied, “and are you trying to teach us?” Then they threw him out. [35] Jesus heard that they had thrown the man out, and when he found him, he asked, “Do you believe in the Son of Man?”
John 12:42 Nevertheless, many did believe in him even among the rulers, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess him, so that they would not be banned from the synagogue.
John 15:20 “Remember the word I spoke to you: ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours.”
John 16:2 They will ban you from the synagogues. In fact, a time is coming when anyone who kills you will think he is offering service to God.
Second, there are repeated mentions of religious violence and fear of religious authorities.
John 5:18 This is why the Jews began trying all the more to kill him: Not only was he breaking the Sabbath, but he was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal to God.
John 7:13 Still, nobody was talking publicly about him for fear of the Jews.
10:12 “The hired hand, since he is not the shepherd and doesn’t own the sheep, leaves them and runs away when he sees a wolf coming. The wolf then snatchesand scatters them.”
John 11:8 “Rabbi,” the disciples told him, “just now the Jews tried to stone you, and you’re going there again?”
John 12:10-11 But the chief priests had decided to kill Lazarus also, [11] because he was the reason many of the Jews were deserting them and believing in Jesus.
John 19:38 After this, Joseph of Arimathea, who was a disciple of Jesus—but secretly because of his fear of the Jews—asked Pilate that he might remove Jesus’s body.
John 20:19 When it was evening on that first day of the week, the disciples were gathered together with the doors locked because they feared the Jews.
John 20:26 A week later his disciples were indoors again, and Thomas was with them…[and] the doors were locked.
Can you hear the story? Why would there be so much repeated emphasis on fear and religious violence? Because that is what John’s audience lived through. John highlights those themes to point out how the story of Jesus speaks specifically to the lived experience of religious trauma.
The Group
One of John’s programmatic, foundational themes is that famous statement in 1:14, “The Word became flesh, and dwelt among us.” This group is a way for the Word to become flesh. After Jesus, the enfleshed Word, was raised and ascended to heaven, he sent the Spirit and became Word again in the pages of Scripture. We encounter the enfleshed Word in the Bible. “The gospel of John provides more than the fact of the Incarnation; through the very specific words the Word speaks, the gospel narrative enacts the Incarnation for the gospel’s readers.”1
And, as 1 John 4:12 makes clear, we encounter the divine Word in other brothers and sisters: “No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.” We are invited into a process, of Word becoming flesh [incarnation], expressed in words [inspired Scripture], and then those words put on flesh again among us in our love for one another. And we participate in the divine Word when we likewise allow the Word to be enfleshed among us.
It’s a reciprocal dynamic of finding our story in this story of the Word, which sheds further light on our story, which then invites the Word into our lives today by the presence of the Spirit who mediates the divine Word and the written Word.
Format
The basic format of the group is simple—on the surface more like a 12-step meeting or a Bible study. But it is a support group, and it’s not a traditional Bible study, nor is it a 12-step meeting. 21 of the meetings will be devoted to each of John’s 21 chapters. Additionally, we will have a joint intro session, a final closing session, and an (optional) individual session with me. Each meeting we will read the chapter aloud in the group, go through a round of sharing, read the chapter again, and then a second round of sharing. We also practice a short time of silence, starting at one minute and gradually working up to five minutes.
The key element that makes this group supportive and healing is that we will explicitly and intentionally read John in light of religious trauma and experiences of spiritual abuse/church harm/deconstruction/etc. That is literally why this Gospel was written and how it was intended to be read by the original audience. As Barbara Stewart put it when describing her trauma recovery groups for war veterans reading through Homer’s Odyssey and Iliad, “It is a book group where we put the text in the middle of the room and allow its meanings to resonate.”2 We will put the Fourth Gospel in the middle of the room and allow its meanings to resonate. Additionally, following Stewart, “[John] offers [survivors] a map for coming home. The reading group provides the opportunity to read the map.”3 Like traumatized war veterans being guided home in their reading of the Odyssey4, John guides traumatized believers to the home promised by Father, Son, and Holy Spirit (John 14:2, 17, 23). Only, as John tells us, we have a distinct advantage: Jesus promised his Spirit to all disciples, and promised that the Spirit “will teach you all things and remind you of everything I have told you” (14:26). “If this story is the story of the enfleshed Word, what happens to the words of the Word when the Incarnation comes to an end, as it will with Jesus’ death? The resolution, which Jesus himself offers within the framework of the story, is that the Paraclete will carry Jesus’ words into the future.”5 The Spirit leads us to the words of the Word in the Gospel of John so that they are not just words but, as Jesus said, “The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and are life” (6:63).
Not a Therapy Group
This group is designed to be supportive and to provide a place for belonging and healing through the sharing of personal experience. However, it is not group therapy in the sense of process groups or individualized work. While this group is for trauma survivors, it is not focused on the embodied wounds of trauma (nervous system regulation skills, etc.), nor is there focused education on abuse, trauma, and receovery (defining, recognizing, naming, etc.). Those are critical components of healing which can be addressed through counseling or other support groups. While this group is supportive in nature, at times a member can experience some discomfort. If this were to happen, or has a chance of happening, members are encouraged to have an outside counselor. I am also available for individual counseling and can be reached at hanncounseling@gmail.com and https://aaronjhann.com.
A Note on Potential Members
I will often refer to members as friends because of Jesus’ astounding statement in John 15:15, “I have called you friends.” It is possible that your group will have friends with some or all of these experiences: friends from toxic, abusive systems with harmful theology but without any specific abuser or abuse event; friends who were spiritually abused by peers; friends who were spiritually abused by parents; friends who were spiritually abused by pastors, teachers, and organizational leaders; and friends who were leaders abused by other leaders and/or congregants. (Of course, none of that excludes other forms of abuse in addition to the spiritual component). Depending on one’s personal experience, having friends with different experiences can be triggering. This is actually a good thing, though it isn’t easy. It creates the possibility of seeing the humanity in someone who, because of association with our own trauma, we might prejudge as bad/dangerous/untrustworthy. It is important to be aware of this possibility, but at the same time, all potential members are screened to ensure good fit and safety for the group.
24 Weeks?
24 weeks is long. That’s basically six months. Change takes time. Healing and repair, when lasting, takes time. I recognize six months might sound like too much. As a survivor of religious trauma you may not even know what your life will look like in 6 months, what job you will have, where you will live. That’s okay. You will get more out of this group if you can attend every meeting, but attendance is certainly not mandatory. I am asking members to commit to a minimum of 18 sessions (about 75% of the group). General consistency is for the good of the group as well as each member, and a consistent place of belonging can re-ignite and sustain hope, whatever your unique season of life.
Book/Word and Group/Flesh
I call this a “book group,” and I use that phrase intentionally. It is word and flesh. Scripture and embodied relationship (even if we aren’t in the same room together).
Now, you might find one or both of the elements—the book and the group—triggering and daunting. Religious groups are scary after spiritual abuse. The Bible is scary after spiritual abuse. But we need both: we need grace from God offered to us in his Word, and we need that grace to be Spiritually mediated through connection with others. My aim is for this book group to provide a safe environment—kind of like the locked room in which the disciples hid from the dangerous religious authorities in John 20. They still locked the room one week later even though Jesus had already proclaimed to them the shalom of God in his healed hands and side (20:26). This group is a room where you can meet Jesus again, in the middle of your fear, joining hands with fellow traumatized brothers and sisters.
If you are doubting in the wake of trauma, wrestling with what you believe, asking questions while also afraid to ask questions, this book group is for you.
If you were abused by a pastor, religious leader, and/or church community, this book group is for you.
If you were silenced, forced out, or kicked out of your church, this book group is for you.
If church and faith stirs fear and anger and other negative emotions, this book group is for you.
If you feel like an outcast and are searching for where you belong, this book group is for you.
If you were betrayed and scandalized by a trusted leader or group of leaders, this book group is for you.
This book is for you, and this group is for you, and I look forward to taking this journey through John together.
Interest
If this interests you, please submit your information at this link: Google Interest Form.
If you think this group might benefit a friend, relative, or person under your care, please consider sharing this information.
Testimonials from previous members:
“The time spent in this group is precious. I found the community, support, and discussions in this group healing. Reading through the book of John together and sharing stories and perspectives created a safe space for personal growth.” — Anonymous
“You’re not alone. Come join and see how not alone you are.” — Anonymous
“This group is truly wonderful. It is a safe place to feel seen, heard, and share the scripture together. I highly recommend this group and Aaron Hann’s other services. He’s so knowledgeable, caring, and offers transformational support.” — Anonymous
NOTES
1 Gail O’Day, “‘I have said these things to you…’: The Unsettled Place of Jesus’ Discourses in Literary Approaches to the Fourth Gospel,” in Word, Theology, and Community in John, edited by John Painter, Alan Culpepper, and Fernando Segovia (Chalice Press, 2022), 153.
2 Roberta Stewart, “Amphora: Ancient Narratives and Modern War Stories: Reading Homer with Combat Veterans” (Society for Classical Studies, August 8, 2015), 5.
The book of James in the Bible is full of teaching on the abusive heart.
Though it speaks generally to all people, it also has specific value for leaders—those with formal or informal power over others.
After providing a beautiful and life-changing discussion on how to persevere under trials, James begins to delve into the heart of oppressive behavior. The warning shot comes in verse 19 of the first chapter:
Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
“Angry” is often a descriptive term for those who are abusive of others. Though anger is not normally at the heart of the abusive leader’s problem—rather entitlement and control—it is a means and method for achieving these desires of the abuser.
This one sentence written by James, the brother of Jesus Christ, is antithetical to anger.
Listen.
Wait.
Be right.
A leader who fails to listen to others is not producing “the righteousness of God.” He has his own views, rights, and privileges in mind, not the good of others or the organization he serves. Listening to others implies truly hearing what they have to say and giving them the respect they deserve as God’s image bearers.
This can be applied as well to the leader who seemingly listens to and yet ignores his subordinates. The term “hear” means “to attend to, consider what is or has been said.” Again, is he giving honor to those who serve at his behest? Hearing means truly listening . . . no just acting like it.
Hypocrisy
James goes on in this same passage to challenge those who are wrapped up in a “Christiany” image but are in fact hypocrites. They put on an act of being Christian by spouting biblical sounding speeches, but in fact do not actually live those same words in their daily lives and leadership:
But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. 23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. 24 For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. [James 1:22-24]
These “Christian” leaders appear to hear the words of God but immediately turn away from them in their daily life. They are surrounded by the Word of God—in the organization masthead, organization chapels, staff meetings, church partnering—but it is all just window-dressing. Often the leader is more concerned about funding the organization than he is about following Christ “whether he eats or drinks, or whatever he does.”
So, he speaks a good line that sounds Christian for all the donors and likely the staff, but his heart is really far from it.
Out of the Mouth
In verse 26, James brings the tongue back into the discussion:
If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless. 27 Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
James takes a hard stance against the evil that comes out of the mouth. It comes back over and over again.
Much of our “behavior” —outward actions—is how we speak to and about others. Just as James says, our tongues are fires (James 3:5), ready to accomplish our scorched earth policies.
Does the leader think of himself, and even defend himself as a good Christian? Does he see himself as religious—after all, he runs a Christian organization or goes to church regularly, maybe even is a Sunday school teacher, or fills the pulpit periodically.
James says, if he “does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.“
In chapter three James goes on with further criticism of those who use the tongue abusively:
For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, 8 but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. 9 With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing.
Deadly Poison
“Deadly poison.” Strong words. James shows the incomprehensibility of those who claim to love Christ and yet “curse” others. The Greek term καταράομαι (curse) means to “curse, doom, imprecate evil upon” someone else.
As poison it hurts and kills. Though sticks and stones can break our bones, cursing others is murderous. It destroys the emotional and spiritual health of others. It often destroys other’s relationship with the Lord having come from a “Christian” leader.
James, by inspiration of the Holy Spirit, gets the harm abusive words cause.
The hypocrisy of those who lead a Christian organizations—or any other organization for that matter—claiming to be a follower of Christ and yet behaving with a pattern of abusive language is beyond comprehension.
Appropriately, James has the strongest words for those who tear down others with their words—words that should give life and hope to others.
Do you take seriously the words that come from your mouth. Do you stop. Listen. And then respectfully hear the words of those under your formal or informal authority? If you continually justify yourself, you need to delve deeper into your heart.
Abusive leadership is a pattern of behavior that tears down others and it is so often with words—even words that sound Christian.
Amaziah seemed attentive to the LORD as he began his reign as king of Judah 2800 years ago.
When preparing to go to war, he put together an impressive force of power. He hired mercenaries from the northern kingdom, Israel—100,000 of them.
However, a “man of God” came to him and discouraged him from using the mercenaries in the battle. He rather encouraged Amaziah to rely upon the LORD instead of seeking the help of his Israelite mercenaries.
Of course, Amaziah feared losing the money he had promised to the mercenaries. But he was encouraged by the man of God that the LORD would provide for him. Amaziah believed him, paid the cash he promised the mercenaries, and as a result was victorious in battle because he relied on the LORD.
King Amaziah reigned in Judah for 29 years, beating the 20 years that the average king ruled in the southern kingdom.
Scipture tells us “he did what was right in the eyes of the LORD, yet not with a whole heart.”
2 Chronicles 25:2
The Slide
That sensitive heart that was willing to hear criticism, even criticism that would affect his wallet, disappeared however.
Once he had won the battle, Amaziah “brought the gods of the men of Seir and set them up as his gods and worshiped them, making offerings to them.”
Therefore the LORD was angry with Amaziah and sent to him a prophet, who said to him, “Why have you sought the gods of a people who did not deliver their own people from your hand?”
2 Chronicles 25:15
Instead of displaying a heart of love for the LORD, the sensitivity he had when he began his reign, Amaziah interupts a prophet sent by the LORD to challenge him, saying, “Have we made you a royal counselor? Stop! Why should you be struck down?”
So the prophet stopped, but said, “I know that God has determined to destroy you, because you have done this and have not listened to my counsel.”
2 Chronicles 25:16
Beginning Well
Unfortunately, this is so often the heart of man.
Leaders begin well. The LORD has given them vision for the organization they have been tasked with leading. Their motives, though always mixed—for we are never without sin—are that God be glorified in the church, business, or organization and that they serve people. Diane Langberg says,
Many times someone starts out believing they are called by God and instilled with a God-given vision. Somewhere down the road, when the vision has grown, the demands are great, and the pressure is on, the servant becomes obedient to the work and its demands rather than to Christ.
They begin a mission work in Africa that desires to help people use their gifts to create beauty, good crops, healthy societies, biblical churches, or other fulfillments of the “dominion mandate.” I worked for one of these visionary missionaries.
Or they plant a church that seeks to be engaged with the surrounding culture, giving light and a witness to Christ. They serve their neighborhoods and their churches expand exponentially.
Or they start a ministry helping people build their own home, giving witness to the love of Jesus. The ministry soon covers the globe.
Drinking the Koolaid
But, in time they begin to drink the koolaid of power and self-sufficiency.
Amaziah, after seeing the LORD’s destruction of his enemies in Seir, turned his eye upon his brothers in the north—Israel. He challenged King Joash and the king rebuffed him. Scripture says that the LORD was bringing about the downfall of Amaziah because he had turned from God to himself.
So, Amaziah, in his arrogance goes up against Israel. 2nd Chronicles says,
And Joash king of Israel captured Amaziah king of Judah, the son of Joash, son of Ahaziah, at Beth-shemesh, and brought him to Jerusalem and broke down the wall of Jerusalem for 400 cubits, from the Ephraim Gate to the Corner Gate.
The Israelite king stole all the gold and silver from the Temple and Amaziah’s palace in Jerusalem in addition to taking hostages back to Samaria with him.
Though Amaziah lived another 15 years in Jerusalem, Scripture is silent regarding those years. Those years of his reign are clearly of no consequence.
Amaziah’s slide into toxic leadership left him broken and in the end men within his own government made a conspiracy against him and he ran for the hills. However, they caught up with him and murdered him.
The Failure of Toxic Leadership
This is the way of toxic leadership. When man begins to rely upon himself—maybe on marketing, image control, power, and authority—he begins the slide into a leadership that no one wants. There will be rebellion, financial failure, and possibly a legacy of hatred rather than the glory the leader so desparately desires.
Toxic leadership almost never ends well.
But it is never too late to turn in repentance; to admit to failure. Turn from self to the LORD. Turn to the only One who can be relied upon to run your church, business, or organization.
Your legacy of self-importance is not nearly as important as His glory.
Recently, I was having one of those imaginary discussions. You know, the conversations where your anger ramps up against whom you had a disagreement—though they are not present to actually fight back?
One of the things I stated to my imaginary combatant was, “You are going to tell me that you are doubting the LORD of heaven and earth, Who created you, and could crush you with His pinky?”
All people, everywhere, at all times have been tempted to distrust the LORD—often many times per day. That distrust of God in essence is what drives our trust in ourselves. We, in practice, believe that we can make better decisions, control situations better, and get the job done better than the LORD, even if we would never admit that.
How could we ever presume to be so powerful. There is one God and he can crush us with His pinky.
So too the Israelite leaders—priests and kings and counselors—thought they knew better than the LORD when Zechariah spoke around 500 B.C.
But Zechariah pummeled the Israelite leadership with these words:
“My [God’s] anger is hot against the shepherds, and I will punish the leaders; for the LORD of hosts cares for his flock, the house of Judah, and will make them like his majestic steed in battle. 4 From him shall come the cornerstone, from him the tent peg, from him the battle bow, from him every ruler—all of them together. 5 They shall be like mighty men in battle, trampling the foe in the mud of the streets; they shall fight because the LORD is with them, and they shall put to shame the riders on horses.”
Zechariah 10:3-5 (ESV)
God is angry at the leaders of His people.
So much so, He promises to punish them. This is a common theme among the “minor prophets” of the Old Testament. Prophets like Zechariah were continually calling God’s people to repentance for their evil, often for the way the leaders (more powerful) oppressed the vulnerable (the weaker). The leaders are held to a higher standard throughout Scripture.
How does Zechariah say God will punish these wicked leaders?
He is going to raise up the followers—the house of Judah—to overwhelm the leaders. The humble will overcome the great. The arrogance of the wicked leaders will be judged.
Symbolic Implements of Destruction
Zechariah notes the symbolic implements of destruction as the means by which these subordinates would bring judgment upon the leaders:
From him shall come the cornerstone,
from him the tent peg,
from him the battle bow
Though we see the LORD raise up other nations to drag these leaders into exile, the ultimate fulfillment is found 500 years later through the raising of Jesus—born in the house of Judah—from the dead.
Some commentaries suggest the CORNERSTONE to be symbolic of a ruler or prince. Ultimately, we know that the LORD raised up Jesus Christ to be the true Israelite cornerstone—ruler and prince—and exemplify the leader who brings restoration and healing to the downtrodden Israelites.
However, He does so by also judging the evil of man’s out of control leadership which Israel was experiencing at the time of Zechariah.
Zechariah says the TENT PEG will be brought forth by the LORD. Most suggest this refers to the symbolic purpose of the tent peg:
The allusion is either to a nail, by which the timber in the building is compacted together, and the whole is strengthened, as the church is by Christ: or to a nail to which the cords of tents are fastened, as those of shepherds, travellers, or soldiers; the church is as such a tent . . .
Jesus, the Cornerstone will bring the nation together against these wicked leaders.
However, there may be another interpretation: The allusion may be to Judges 4:21 where Jael, “the wife of Heber took a tent peg, and took a hammer in her hand. Then she went softly to him and drove the peg into his temple until it went down into the ground while he was lying fast asleep from weariness. So he died.”
A wicked king in Canaan, Sisera, was subdued by a “tent-dwelling woman.” So, too it will be a lowly carpenter’s Son [Jesus] who will drive the nail destroying wicked leadership of God’s people (Rev. 20:11f).
And the final implement of war and destruction—of overcoming wicked leadership—is the bow; used as our drones are today to bring down enemies at a distance.
My imaginary conversation came around to the LORD Who can crush me with His little finger. Leaders, in the home or workplace or church, who think they are so powerful to control and suck the life out of their subjects need beware:
The Cornerstone, nail, and bow of the LORD will ultimately destroy those who have been raised up to lead and who have used that privilage and responsibility to oppress God’s people instead of serving them.
Zechariah calls for repentance as all the minor prophets do. Will wicked leaders heed the warning? Will they turn from their wicked leadership before the LORD crushes them with His pinky?
I have heard periodically that the Bible does not include the term, “abuse.”
However, I am not sure from where that idea came. There are a number of places that the translation of Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic words can be and are accurately understood to mean “abuse.”
In addition, language scholars instruct that it is abuse in much the same way we would define emotional, psychological, and spiritual abuse in our world of toxic leadership.
Matthew narrates the story of Jesus giving a sermon on, what has become known as, the Mount of Beatitudes. There Jesus uses the term rhaká (ῥακά) which means, according to the Theological Dictionary of the New Testmament,1 “blockhead or fool.”
But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.
Matthew 5:22 (ESV)
According to Kittel, the author of the TDNT, the word comes from the Aramaic term for abuse. He says, “The Aramaic term expresses disparagement accompanied by anger and contempt. Addressed to the foolish, thoughtless, or presumptuous person, it means ‘blockhead,’ and is the most common term of abuse in Jesus’ day.”
Kittel goes on to say that the sins of the tongue are very serious in God’s eyes: they are put on a par with murder.
In addition he says, “In the world of Jesus injury by words is of the utmost seriousness.”
Luke
Luke also records one of Jesus’ sermons in chapter 6 of his book. Here Jesus says,
“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”
Luke 6:27-28 (ESV)
The Greek term “epēreazō (ἐπηρεάζω)” means in English to “insult, to treat abusively, use despitefully, to revile, in a forensic sense to accuse falsely, and to threaten.”
Proverbs
The wise king Solomon noted,
Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease.
Proverbs 22:10 (ESV)
The ESV translates the Hebrew term qâlôn (קָלוֹן) as abuse. That word means “shame, disgrace, dishonour, ignominy” according to Strongs Dictionary.
This is exactly as we understand emotional, psychological, or spiritual abuse.
Paul
Paul, in his second letter to Timothy tells the young pastor,
But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 (ESV)
When the ESV says “abusive,” it is translating the Greek word, “blasphēmos” (βλάσφημος). You probably recognize the word. When we talk about blaspheming against the Lord, this is the word we are using.
It means, “speaking evil, slanderous, reproachful, railing, abusive.” Very strong terms for words used against others.
Summary
Hopefully you get the idea that indeed, Scripture does use words for abuse and it gives abusive words great weight.
The brother of a friend of ours expressed his frustration with his sister’s difficulty with an abusive husband by saying, “It’s a damn load.” He was put out by the relational damage but not very empathetic for what she was going through. He was only really concerned about the disruption in his own life.
This is what the sinful rebellion of God’s creatures brings about . . . a damn load. Abuse is a horrible sin and it is extraordinarily destructive.
Ronald Pitkin, Theological Dictionary of the New Testament, ed. Gerhard Kittel and Gerhard Friedrich, Abridged edition (W. B. Eerdmans, 2006). ↩︎
Jesus miraculously raised his friend named Lazarus from the dead.
Because of that increadible feat, many began to follow Him. And those in power, the chief priests and Pharisees, could not allow their control and authority to slip away.
Jesus had consistently challenged these religious-political leaders of his day. They were abusive leaders, using Scripture and their positions of authority to crush and oppress others rather than as good shepherds (Ezekiel 34).
Their power was slipping with each man, woman, or child who dared follow Jesus, rejecting their false teaching.
So, they had to get rid of the problem. After all they had their image to protect.
Of course, they planned and plotted to destroy Jesus . . . both physically and in carefully worded debates (Luke 20:19-20).
The Tactics
One of the more common tactics for abusive leaders is to destroy, justify, or coverup the evidence of the light that is shown on their abuse.
They sought to kill Lazarus. Destroy the evidence of Jesus’ truth and light and beauty.
“When the large crowd of the Jews learned that Jesus was there, they came, not only on account of him but also to see Lazarus, whom he had raised from the dead. 10 So the chief priests made plans to put Lazarus to death as well, 11 because on account of him many of the Jews were going away and believing in Jesus.”
John 12:9-11 (ESV)
Maybe it is physical evidence that makes them look bad and their victim good that needs to be destroyed? Emails, letters, recordings, or worse yet, witnesses. One missionary told me that his ministry leader rarely communicated on email. When accused of his abusive leadership, it was a “he said, she said” argument. No one had any evidence.
Maybe it is explaining away the evidence? “I didn’t really mean that. I would never have said that. It is out of context.” I watched as one mission director told his subordinate he “would never say such a thing.” The subordinate looked like the crazy one in the conversation.
Or maybe it is finding a way to discredit the evidence by shifting the focus? “He is taking it too personally. She isn’t submissive enough to authority. He has a spirit of division. She just has an attitude problem.” I have been amazed by how often a leadership team has, rather than investigate and consider carefully the reports of abusive leadership, turned on the whisteblower and resorted to name-calling. I was even complicit with a toxic leader at one time, suggesting those who were struggling with the leader were just “hard to get along with.”
Whatever tactic it may be, Lazarus must die that their image remains intact.
DARVO
Common tactics for those who abuse their authority include DARVO. These are effective means for keeping the main thing (report of abuse) NOT the main thing.
It is a hard topic for Christians to wrap their heads around. Interpretations of these prayers for destruction abound.
In this article I am looking at Nehemiah’s imprecatory prayer. The ESV Strong’s Bible translation says in its introduction to the book of Nehemiah:
In 445 B.C. the Persian King Artaxerxes sent Nehemiah, an Israelite who was a trusted official, to help rebuild the walls of Jerusalem. With Nehemiah went the third wave of returning Jewish exiles. There was intense opposition from the other peoples in the land and disunity within Jerusalem. Despite this opposition, Nehemiah led the rebuilding of the walls.
ESV Strongs Bible
That “intense opposition” made many fear for their lives as they worked to rebuild the walls around Jerusalem. Nehemiah, as the leader of the Jews who sought to see the Covenant God had made with His people Israel re-established, gave instructions to the people to take protective measures. “Each of the builders had his sword strapped at his side while he built.” (Nehemiah 4:18)
And so they built. With their weapons handy.
The Imprecatory Prayer of Nehemiah
What was particularly interesting to me is found in chapter 4 of the historical account.
Sanballat, of whom we know very little, was a Horonite (possibly from Samaria). He was apparently the leader of those who opposed the rebuilding of the wall. He and his ilk ridiculed the Jews and sought to stop them.
They shamed and humiliated Nehemiah and the Jews. The language in the text is strikingly similar to how those who are under abusive leadership describe their taunters. Toxic leaders in the home, workplace, and church torment their targets with words that belittle, debase, and humiliate. Often those words are coupled with religious language that creates a greater depth of shame and humiliation in the target (spiritual abuse).
Nehemiah responded in prayer . . . just as he had done before approaching King Artaxerxes to request returning to Jerusalem to build the wall (Nehemiah 1). In his prayer here in chapter 4, Nehemiah expressed his desire that the Jews’ tormentors be destroyed.
Nehemiah prays,
Hear, O our God, for we are despised. Turn back their taunt on their own heads and give them up to be plundered in a land where they are captives. 5 Do not cover their guilt, and let not their sin be blotted out from your sight, for they have provoked you to anger in the presence of the builders.
Nehemiah 4:4-5
No Qualifying
When I normally speak of “imprecatory praying” I give qualifications. Before praying, “Destroy my enemies,” I will pray, “Lord change their heart . . . “
Then I go on with asking the Lord to stop the abusive individual in whatever way the Lord, in His wisdom, wills. I try not to be too specific.
But Nehemiah, in a display of raw emotion, simply asks the Lord to destroy this enemy of God’s people.
Fundamental to his prayer is the understanding that his enemies are enemies of God. Nehemiah was confident of God’s anger at Sanballat. There appears to be no doubt in his mind that Sanballat, and those following him, were evil and that God was opposed to them.
And his prayer is not self-centered. Nehemiah is not praying against someone who simply disagrees with him. He is praying that an enemy of God and one who seeks the destruction of God’s people be stopped.
Dead. In his tracks. No redemption.
That is hard stuff.
But it is the hard stuff from which imprecatory praying grows. Imprecatory prayers are made for those who see no out from the destruction at the hands of evil men. They are the prayers of deeply wounded and hurting people . . . because of the unjust, wicked, and damaging treatment of others.
Forgiveness?
In addition, I want to point out that Nehemiah is not unforgiving as some might think in praying this prayer.
In praying, Nehemiah turns over the judgment upon his (and God’s) enemy, Sanballat to God. This is fundamental to forgiveness. Forgiveness does not necessarily mean there is no judgment. But rather, as some theologians suggest, it is turning over that judgment to the Lord; releasing our own judgment into the hands of God.
Nehemiah prays for God to judge. Afterall, it is God’s place to judge.
It’s Just So Uncomfortable
There are a significant number of imprecatory prayers in Scripture. So often we gloss over them because they make us uncomfortable.
Because we have so often been taught that a good Christian would never ask the Lord to judge someone, we cannot reconcile the imprecatory prayers found throughout the Psalms and here in Nehemiah with that training.
But those who have suffered abuse may not have as much difficulty understanding why they are in Scripture. Imprecatory prayers are actually a balm to those for whom the Lord continually stands up. We have God’s own word that He despises those who oppress others. And these prayers are a means of turning over the judgment we feel is so needed to the Lord Who judges perfectly.
Why should we not join Nehemiah in asking the the Lord to do what He has promised He will do?
The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. 10 And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.
In my own experience with toxic leaders, it was common to hear 1 Peter 2:18 quoted or paraphrased by those who wished to protect the authority of leaders. I quoted it to myself at various times while suffering under leadership abuse. It is often interpreted as a theological barrier to the accountability of Christian leaders.
Does 1 Peter 2 mean that we blindly submit to church and parachurch leaders though they be described as liars, mean, narcissistic, and other nasty characteristics by their followers?
The apostle Peter begins this section on “submission” to various authorities at the beginning of the chapter. Starting in verse 18, Peter instructs,
“Servants, be subject to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the unjust.” [1 Peter 2:18]
Upon initial reading, this verse appears to require absolute submission to abusive leaders. I asked participants in my study if and how they applied this passage to their interactions with their toxic supervisor.
Adam, a former employee of a mission school, said, “I used it against myself just to guilt myself into submitting to [the CEO’s] rule.” Adam said he related it to the Matthew 7 passage [“Judge not, that you be not judged”], telling himself “[the CEO] is very human. He is our director” and therefore, Adam should not judge or rebel against him.
Because Adam was in mid-level management, mediating between the CEO and faculty and staff, he would recall this passage as he struggled in his own relationship with the CEO and when he spoke with those with whom he worked. He would say to himself and others, “The Lord puts you under even unjust authorities. And the way you reach those authorities is to be godly and submissive and humble.”
He noted there were major consequences when employees would challenge the CEO. Rather than confronting the boss and facing those consequences, he kept his head down. He said,
“You have to go home and go to bed and get up the next day. And the only way to survive the next day is to rally your head to think, ‘You know this is just the way Christians live or this is just the way life is and you have to accept it.’”
Adam was in a position to counsel other workers who were suffering under the abuse as well. He felt he had an “obligation to mediate and so I would use things like that [1 Peter 2] on them and it was amazing how it worked!” He said others would respond, “Oh, you’re right. He’s just human.” The status quo was a achieved.
Ben, a director of a Christian education program, suggested that there were two “camps” of people at his organization. There were those who “camped out” in the 1 Peter passage, saying, “We’re just here to take it. It doesn’t matter what happens, it’s not our responsibility. We’ll take it. We’ll suffer. He is our master; therefore, we will be subservient to him.” The others were in the Matthew 18 camp, “constantly butting heads. Constantly trying to bring about change.” [for more on Matthew 18, click here]
Under Whose Authority?
So, how did those who “camped out” in 1 Peter 2 seek to submit to authority?
Ben suggested that he and his wife’s “accountability” was “to those who put us there.” The churches and individuals who supported them financially were their “bosses.” Rather than consider the CEO of the mission their “master” (vis-à-vis 1 Peter 2), Ben believed those who paid their salary (donors) were their boss.
For example, Ben recounted a sermon given by the founder that was a “tirade against the students” and spiritually “manipulative.” He sent the recording to several supporters, who were his mentors, for their advice. Ben said they all responded, “Something’s wrong. It’s not you…something’s broken.”
He believed it was to these supporters he was “subservient to in his position.” He finished by saying, “It is a very unique relationship to have. Because, yes, he is my boss. Yes, I answer to him. But my livelihood in no way depended on him.”
Slave or Employee?
I have found significant disagreement among commentators regarding the application of 1 Peter 2:18-25 to these situations. Peter instructs “household servants” to voluntarily submit in action and attitude to their master.[1] But, Alan Stibbs and Matthew Henry disagree on the identification of household servants. Where Henry argues broadly for any modern-day employee fitting the description of a household servant,[2] Stibbs suggests the Greek terminology means a slave, one who is under “absolute ownership and uncontrolled power.”[3]
This distinction is very important to employees of Christian organizations. It can mean the difference between continuing to work for a toxic boss in silence or confronting and possibly leaving the organization, in effect, rejecting their authority. If the passage is speaking broadly to any employee, it is easy to come to the conclusion that the employee is responsible to keep his mouth shut and submit to his each and every command (as long as it isn’t against the Word of God).
Because the passage is speaking in the context of slavery, however it is important to be careful in the application of it to our free-market economy. A slave, by definition, had little choice about their employment. They were not free to come and go as they pleased. Should they stand up to the master, especially a “harsh” one, they could expect a harsh response.
Rather, is it possible the passage is speaking very practically, giving the slave both hope and permission? “Hope” that, by submitting to the boss, the leader will see the slave’s good works, repent, and glorify God in heaven (verse 12 of the same chapter)? And “permission” to protect themselves by keeping their head down, knowing any response on their part is likely to bring harsh consequences from the master?
This is very different from the circumstances of a non-slave employee in a Christian organization. They have the options of confronting a professing Christian leader/brother in their leadership and to leave the organization at will. Bosses of Christian organizations are no more above the accountability of their brothers than the elders in the Ephesian church where Paul suggests they should be confronted “in the presence of all.” [1 Timothy 5:20]
As R.C. Sproul argues, Peter and the apostles refused to obey the dictates of the “senate of the people of Israel” in Acts 5:27-32 when told not to “teach in [Jesus’] name,” so the authority of any man is not absolute over God’s people.[5]
If man’s authority is not absolute [Acts 5:27-32] and Peter was speaking specifically to slaves, it may make more interpretive sense that leaders of free men should be held accountable. Submission to man’s authority is most certainly a biblical ethic, but not absolute, nor intended by God for the oppression of His people as they serve Him in the marketplace.
NOTES
[1]Stibbs, Alan M. The First Epistle General of Peter: An Introduction and Commentary. Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1988. Page 110.
[2]Henry, Matthew. Matthew Henry’s Commentary on the Whole Bible. Vol. V. 6 vols. Hendrickson Publishers, 2009.
[3] Stibbs, The First Epistle General of Peter, 114.
