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Jealousy and Leadership: A Toxic Mix

December 18, 2025January 25, 2026 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

For the leader who considers his authority questioned whenever another human being in his orbit receives accolades for his or her skills, the temptation to not only covet but attempt control over that gifted one is a problem.

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Jeanie’s Story: Shepherding Abuse Survivors Takes Wisdom

December 28, 2024August 9, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

Jeanie endured years of emotional and sexual abuse from her husband Richard, facing neglect and inadequate support from church leaders.

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Job’s Counselors: The Misuse of Spiritual Influence

May 20, 2024November 24, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

The book of Job highlights misguided counseling of abuse victims rooted in black-and-white beliefs, instead of comprehensive biblical theology. Remember,buse victims are never at fault for the abuse they experience.

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Rachel’s Story: Tenacious Pursuit of Justice

September 18, 2023December 2, 2023 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

When Rachel Black was struggling to make sense of her abusive pastor, there was no Christianity Today Mars Hill podcasts and seemingly no books on how an employee in a church is to respond to such disregard. All she knew was the "hairs on her arms stood up" as she sought to understand her boss.

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God’s Definition of Leadership: Concentrating on Responsibility Rather than Authority

April 10, 2023October 19, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

We look for strong leaders using the world’s standards of leadership . . . not God’s. Elders in Christ's church are called to serve; this is how they are to lead. Jesus served.

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Silencing Victims in the Church: Kayla and Amber’s Story

February 17, 2023October 19, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / 2 Comments

Amber, a young adult, was committed to church. She loved the fellowship and teaching. Then something happened.

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Consider It Joy [In Time]! Weeping With Those Who Weep

January 31, 2023January 31, 2023 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

"Consider it joy! It will make you stronger." Yes, the Bible tells me so. But it so often seems so callous for someone to remind me of it. Rather, Weep.

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Giving Leaders a Free Pass: The Story of Praise

November 30, 2022December 1, 2022 / pearlsandswinesite / 1 Comment

Having spent nearly a decade working for a mission college in Africa, I have a keen interest in African leadership. When I spoke with Praise (not his real name), he shared his own experience with leadership abuse in the African nation in which he grew up.

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I Loathe My Life: Listening to Victims

November 9, 2022September 12, 2023 / pearlsandswinesite / 1 Comment

Those who are honored to hear an abuse victim's story need to hear Job's story. They need to hear his words . . . and they need to hear his friends' words.

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Pastoral Steamroller: Michael’s Story

September 2, 2022February 24, 2024 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

Michael and Kate realized the abuse of power by bullying, control, using the scriptures to condemn, shunning, and slander had been going on for a long time.

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