Category Archives: Trauma

3 Biblical Ways to Respond to Toxic Bosses: Head Up, Down, or Out of Town

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For the Christian, we know God has given us what we need to glorify Him and enjoy Him forever.

However, we sometimes feel trapped by our understanding of His direction. We may think when we are serving in a Christian ministry that there is a one-way road map when dealing with a self-serving and destructive ministry leader. 

However, there is more than one response to toxic bosses found in scripture.

The Bible gives at least three ways by example and instruction for dealing with abusive supervisors:

  • Head Up
  • Head Down
  • Head Out

Head Up

There is Nathaniel who, as a prophet, who went to King David (who had the man-given power to destroy him) and confronted him for his sin against Bathsheba and her husband Urriah (2 Sam. 12). Because David was not a toxic boss (though horribly sinful), he responded well to Nathaniel’s challenge. He repented.

After reposting this blog, a friend pointed out to me the example of Paul when being held by Roman authorities. My friend wrote, “Paul’s response in first submitting, and when wronged, appealing to a higher authority, where his rights were demonstrably violated . . . was helpful in guiding my response as those with authority wronged me . . .” (see Acts 22 for one such story)

On the other hand, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego refused to worship the gods of Nebuchadnezzar and he did not respond as David did. The trio said:

“O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king. But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.” 

Daniel 3:16-18

And the King’s response?

“Then Nebuchadnezzar was filled with fury, and the expression of his face was changed against Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. He ordered the furnace heated seven times more than it was usually heated.” 

Daniel 3:19

The three men trusted in the Lord, and kept their heads high. Nebuchadnezzar was intending to fry them to a crisp, but God saved them. He does not always save those who stand up against oppression, but he did in their case.

Sometimes, God calls his children to hold their head high when facing abusive authorities so it can be cut off!

Head Down

However, there are those who feel there is nowhere for them to go. They feel trapped and unable to make any real change in their circumstances. They fear the results of the heads up approach.

For example, we see in Peter’s first epistle instructions for the slave dealing with a “unjust” master.

Servants, be subject to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the unjust.

1 Peter 2:18

When interpreting this passage, we must firstly remember that Peter was speaking specifically to slaves, not your average 21st Century employee. Though there is much to be learned in the passage throughout the ages and in voluntary work situations, these slaves, whether forced into servitude or by choice signed their lives away because of financial need, were not at liberty to leave their place of employment.

Peter says, “Keep your head down so it will not be any worse for you.”

I believe Peter is speaking to those who are convinced nothing good can come of responding to the boss. The employee is convinced that any response will only make matters worse, bring greater emotional trauma, and possibly the loss of his job.

He goes on to say that it is better to be treated badly when doing the right thing than doing wrong.

I believe he is critiquing responding with abusive tactics to the abusive tactics of the leader. We at times feel justified in striking back in anger and using one-line clever quips to put someone down. However, even engagement with evil people should be a witness to the abuser and others.

So, we are called to show respect for the image of God in that evil person though they be unjust.

Peter bases his instruction on the example of Christ when he went before the authorities who unjustly abused Him and he did not strike back . . . though he could have done away with all of them with one word as the Son of God. Jesus did not attack.

God gives permission to keep your head down and take the abuse at least when you see no other good options in the circumstances.

Head Out

Finally, there is one last way to respond to nasty bosses:

Get out of there.

Jesus, in Luke 4, chose to disappear into the crowd rather than be thrown over a cliff. His time had not come for Calvary and so He walked away from the abuse. There would come a time when he would keep His head up (responding to the Chief Priest especially) and keep His head down (responding to Pontius Pilot), but in Luke 4 He got out of there.

Trauma increases with greater and greater exposure to abuse. Distrust in organizations, boards, leaders and all things Christian build over time. Several of my interviewees testified to these results of their experience of staying in a toxic organization.

My Own Experience

I have seen all three of these responses from others who have suffered under toxic leadership. My wife and I used all three when working with a mission agency for eight years.

  • I challenged the CEO on one occasion (head up) and he shifted the blame and let me know it was not appropriate for me to challenge his views.
  • We refused to get sucked into a discussion (which would likely be used against us) about our issues with the CEO (head down). He had shown himself to be lacking in humility and to use what was said in meetings with missionaries to hurt them later.
  • And, we finally left the organization knowing there was nothing left to be done about the leadership.

Rest in knowing that the Lord leads His people and gives wisdom as we ask (James 1:5). Though we can seek justice (head up), there are other options that are just as biblical and should be considered according to the circumstances, the Lord’s leading, and your conscience.

Keep your head up, down, or head out of town.

Imprecatory Praying: The Mercy of Destruction

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Our CEO’s wife was a bear. She bragged how she would run off roommates in college so she could have the room to herself. She had not changed in the ensuing years.

On the other hand, her husband was rather charming. You mostly knew where you stood with her—in the doghouse. But, her husband? He manipulated circumstances with great skill. 

There are times when a Christian struggles with what kind of attitude he should have towards a boss who seems quite beyond the reach of the Gospel.

Maybe the boss is unwilling to see his evil behavior. Maybe the power differential between the boss and subordinate makes it non-condusive to confronting the boss’ sin. Maybe attempts have been made to bring reconciliation in the relationship and failed miserably. In fact, maybe the attempts made it even worse.

Christians read the Psalms and find statements that seem to conflict with the open-hearted, mercy-oriented, forgiveness-driven Gospel we preach from our pulpits. King David, a man after God’s own heart, says,

For it is not an enemy who taunts me—
then I could bear it;
it is not an adversary who deals insolently with me—
then I could hide from him.
But it is you, a man, my equal,
my companion, my familiar friend.
We used to take sweet counsel together;
within God’s house we walked in the throng.
Let death steal over them;
let them go down to Sheol alive;
for evil is in their dwelling place and in their heart.

Psalms 55:12-15 (ESV)

Imprecatory Psalms

Psalm 55 is among the Psalms called “imprecatory.” These Psalms are those that call for the destruction of or curses upon the enemy of the writer. An article on the Bible Gateway website lists Psalms 5, 10, 17, 35, 58, 59, 69, 70, 79, 83, 109, 129, 137, and 140 as imprecatory Psalms.[1]

One commentary on the imprecatory Psalms said, “These prayers awaken the conscience to the human cry for redress, the cosmic demand for moral order and justice. They can lead one to feel as deeply as one ought the horrendous insult to Yahweh and his creation perpetrated by those who lie and cheat and kill and abuse and blaspheme . . .These prayers awaken that outrage, which is to be offered to God and which motivates to redemptive action.“

Discomfort with Judgment

When I have spoken with Christian employees about Psalm 55, they were clearly uncomfortable with the judgmental character of it. Even among theologians there is obvious discomfort. More often than not, the words of David are ignored or downplayed and it is suggested we should pray for evil people to be redeemed—not destroyed.

It was not until serving under a toxic boss and doing research into the dynamics of abuse that I began to understand the imprecatory Psalms.

In Matthew 7, Jesus calls those who do not respond well to confrontation “pigs,” and suggests silence rather than confrontation. David, in Psalm 55, takes it a step further, praying for the judgment and destruction of his enemies. He says, with apparent assurance, “But you, O God, will cast them down into the pit of destruction.”[2]

A Familiar Friend

To many who have suffered under toxic leadership, David’s struggle is very familiar as it was for my wife and me. David noted that his enemy is not an unknown person. He is David’s friend. David calls him “my equal, my companion, my familiar friend.”[3]

David says he could have tolerated “oppression and fraud,” however “what incurs his wrath is the treachery of a trusted friend.”[4] The psalmist explains it was not an adversary who oppressed him, but an individual with whom he took “sweet counsel together.”

The word counsel “implies intimacy,” according to The New Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible. Donald Guthrie says, David “had known unity of heart” with this friend “as they worshipped God” together.[5]

Some of those with whom I have spoken believed they had good relationships with their leader. Many worshiped, worked, recreated, and socialized with their leader. The Christian organization is sometimes a family-like setting. Often the mission station is a tight-knit group living communally.

Adam, a missionary in Africa, believed his relationship with the CEO was professional, but he also recalled being taken to dinner and enjoying family outings together. Graham said, “We really, really thought we were a Christian family.” My family went on vacations, to dinner, concerts, and to church with our leaders.

When abuse became apparent, the participants were often surprised and confused by the dysfunction in the organization. They, like abuse victims Lundy Bancroft describes, were perplexed by the cruelty displayed by these “friends.”[6]

However, like some commentators, the participants were hesitant to pray as David prayed in their situation. Guthrie said David was God’s “anointed king” and so had a get out of jail free card. He distinguished his circumstances from normal relational conflict. Yet, the Psalms were sung in worship by all Israel, not just David.

Graham, an one of my interviewees, specifically sought to keep such thoughts of “adversary” or “enemy” out of the team’s thinking as he and other employees went through the steps of confrontation with the CEO. To this day he refuses to use this terminology. I heard about a well-known pastor’s experience when an elder in his church was creating division and strife. People were praying for the pastor and the elder died unexpectedly. But, the pastor was unwilling to suggest it was due to God’s judgment.

The Prerogative of a Sovereign God

However, one of the commentators on Psalm 55, Gerhard Vos, believes it is appropriate to ask for God’s judgment on evil. He says, “The total destruction of evil . . . is the prerogative of the sovereign God.” Some consider it “loving” to refrain from praying for the destruction of an evil person. But, it is important to consider not only the perpetrator, but his victims.

How loving is it to suggest the diabolical one keep reaping destruction on his followers? Is it not more loving to look out for those under his oppression—a perspective that God seems to lean heavily towards in His Word—rather than in any way supporting the abuser? Even when a deeply, unrepentant, evil person repents, it is likely the abuse will continue for some time while God sanctifies him.

Vos goes on to say,

“It is right not only to pray for the accomplishment of this destruction, but even to assist in effecting it when commanded to do so by God himself.”[7]

The Ethical Problem of the Imprecatory Psalms

“Assisting” in the destruction, as Vos suggests, may mean seeking his firing. Or calling him to account before others. The final steps of the Matthew 18 principle of confrontation involve group confrontation and shame. This may be the only way others will find relief from his abuse. 

This is loving!

There is a clear distinction in scripture between those who continually refuse repentance and those who have a “heart of flesh” that is teachable. There is a time when trying to “work with someone” comes to an end and public disgrace is necessary to bring justice to the broken-hearted.

This is God-given direction for confronting evil: Praying that God’s mercy will save those suffering from the destruction of the evildoer and doing all in our legitimate power to stop the abuse.

NOTES

[1] “Imprecatory Psalms,” Biblegateway, accessed March 14, 2017, https://www.biblegateway.com/resources/asbury-bible-commentary/Imprecatory-Psalms.

[2] Psalm 55:23.

[3] Psalm 55:13.

[4] Guthrie et al., The New Bible Commentary, 485.

[5] Ibid., 486.

[6] Lundy Bancroft, Why Does He Do That?, 68.

[7] Gerhard Vos, “The Ethical Problem of the Imprecatory Psalms,” 135.

Trauma by Swine #3: Looking for Healing

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https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kelly-dehnert/episodes/Trauma-by-Swine-3-Looking-for-Healing-e25m536

Note: This blog is the third in a series seeking ways for people, who have been traumatized by toxic leaders, to find healing in Christ’s love through the church.

The fear that many experience as they come face-to-face with an abusive leader can create different reactions. Psychologists often talk of “fight, flight, or freeze” reflexes. God has given us a built-in mechanism in our brain that helps us respond to dangerous situations – physical or emotional.

An understanding of what is happening in the brain when faced with trauma is opening fascinating avenues of healing.

For over 100 years, scientists have been studying the effects trauma has on the brain. PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) was diagnosed and named during wartimes in the past century. [Being that this is not a science blog, I won’t go into detail explaining the affects trauma has on the brain. Instead, you can read a wonderful text by Bessel van der Kolk, quoted in the last blog on this topic (and multiple times below).]

Coping

The brokenness of this world, due to the sin of our first parents and our subsequent sin, has provided an open invitation to scientists with a passion for understanding the human condition to research trauma. Kolk has years and clinical study after clinical study under his belt which provide insight into how trauma victims have been damaged and survived.

The brain must take extraordinary measures to keep on an even keel when facing the barrage of abuse. He explains in his book, “The Body Keeps the Score” that he marvels at the resiliency of trauma survivors “and every one of their stories inspires awe at how people cope.”[1]

But, those measures often include difficult, relational consequences. Kolk says:

“Having been exposed to family violence as a child often makes it difficult to establish stable, trusting relationships as an adult.”[2]

One victim of abuse, with whom I spoke, found it difficult to work in ministry with someone who, though not considered very difficult by others, was unbearable for her. She described the “flashbacks” she would have when the co-worker showed the slightest amount of controlling behavior.

Kolk goes on to say,

“While we all want to move beyond trauma, the part of our brain that is devoted to ensuring our survival is not very good at denial. Long after a traumatic experience is over, it may be reactivated at the slightest hint of danger and mobilize disturbed brain circuits and secrete massive amounts of stress hormones.”[3]

Often, we believe we can simply “think through” the issue and overcome the irrational emotions with which we struggle. He notes, a brain subjected to trauma, will continue to react to “triggers” no matter how much thinking about it one does.

When the alarm bell of the emotional brain keeps signaling that you are in danger, no amount of insight will silence it. I am reminded of the comedy in which a seven-time recidivist in an anger-management program extols the virtue of the techniques he’s learned: “They are great and work terrific — as long as you are not really angry.”[4]

As we engage those who have faced trauma we need to keep this in mind. Suggesting their feelings do not make sense or worse, are “stupid,” does nothing to help trauma survivors. As noted in the first blog, having a safe place to talk about their experience is an important first step in healing. And demeaning their “emotional” responses is not helpful to their healing process.

Diagnosing Ourselves

It is helpful for those who have suffered significant abuse by leaders to consider how they are responding to relationships with others as well as with their own bodies. Knowing that trauma can both affect relationships with people and the victim’s physical health can help drive them to seek professional help.

Those who have been traumatized may seem always “stuck in the past” …experiencing flashbacks or unwanted emotional reactions to small things. However, it also affects the present, as Kolk notes:

“Being traumatized is not just an issue of being stuck in the past; it is just as much a problem of not being fully alive in the present.”[5]

Those who continue battling the feelings they feel, yet see little change in their reactions to situations others have no difficulty with, often are “traumatized by subsequent experiences.” They often repeat relationships with other abusers.[6] Maybe the belief that psychology is “unspiritual” or embarrassing keeps targets from seeking help of the sort Kolk would recommend.

However, the effects of trauma can be long-term and continue to plague the victim, deeply affecting relationships with those whom they love and even their physical health.

Seemingly unrelated medical issues can actually be results of the reactions the brain is having to the trauma.

There are many therapies that have proven effective in reorienting the working of the brain that men and women, gifted by God in their study in neuroscience, have discovered. Though there is so much more to be learned, God is working through His creation to bring healing to victims of abusive leaders sorely needed in His church.

NOTES:

[1] Bessel van der Kolk MD, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, 1st ed. (New York: Penguin Books, 2014), Kindle Locations 5245-5246.

[2] Ibid., Kindle Locations 227-228.

[3] Ibid., Kindle Locations 231-233.

[4] Ibid., Kindle Locations 1297-1302.

[5] Ibid., Kindle Locations 4174-4175.

[6] Ibid., Kindle Locations 2286-2287.

Trauma by Swine #2: A Good Creation and Effects of the Fall

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https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/kelly-dehnert/episodes/Trauma-by-Swine-2-A-Good-Creation-and-Effects-of-the-Fall-e25iu2c

Note: This blog is the 2nd in a series seeking ways those who have been traumatized by toxic leaders can find healing in Christ’s love through the church.

We are “fearfully and wonderfully made” according to David.[1] However, we live in a time of strange in-betweenness!

We were created perfectly by a powerful and loving God [אֱלֹהִים] and placed in a beautiful garden where all things were good; the relationships between man and God, man and his wife, man and the created world, and man and self. But, only two chapters later, the man and his wife rejected God’s authority and goodness and sinned against him. The results of that first sin are felt by every one of us in all four relationships noted above.

Our time is in between that incredible creation and the future paradise of the New Heavens and New Earth we first hear by name in the book of Isaiah (and numerous other places in the Bible).[2] Everything will be made right in those relationships when Christ comes again and brings heaven to earth in newness.

The Cosmic Struggle

But, now we live with the horrible effects of the fall while awaiting a renewal of all things. Our relationships are a struggle as we sin and are sinned against. Man and woman struggle. Man and God struggle. Man and creation struggles. And, man struggles with his own self.

It is this last relationship that we must consider as we think about the effects of trauma brought by that boss or supervisor in the church or parachurch organization. There is real trauma created by abusive authorities.

They don’t have to be physically abusive. Emotional abuse is often just as bad or worse, according to Bessel van der Kolk. He says,

“Over the years our research team has repeatedly found that chronic emotional abuse and neglect can be just as devastating as physical abuse and sexual molestation.”[3]

Though there is a big difference between seeing someone murdered in front of you (or being the one who did the murdering) and being abused by a boss, our brains respond to it similarly.

Broken Brains

A difficult concept sometimes for the church to understand is that all relationships were broken in the fall of man into sin.

Though we understand and accept that we fight with God and man in the normal warp and woof of life, it is much more difficult to comprehend that we also battle with our own selves. Our bodies are physically broken by the fall and that includes both our vascular system and our brains.

Our thinking is goofy and our neurons are goofy.

A question I have asked myself (and others) is whether our brains respond to trauma as God has created them or as broken pieces of our self to the broken world around us. I believe, though cannot state it emphatically, that it is both. Our brains were made by a good and powerful Creator . . . and, we are broken and do not respond physically or spiritually the way we would in our original created self.

So, that leaves us with seeking to understand the physical effects of trauma on our brain and determining how our God would desire for us to seek healing.

There is some fascinating research by Kolk and others that helps us understand how God has created us. When faced with trauma, Kolk says,

“We automatically signal our upset in our facial expressions and tone of voice, changes meant to beckon others to come to our assistance. However, if no one responds to our call for help, the threat increases…and the sympathetic nervous system takes over, mobilizing muscles, heart, and lungs for fight or flight.”[4]

Hardwiring

Notice, we are hardwired by the Lord to seek the aid of others [see part 1 of this series]. Communicating with others about the trauma is a God-given drive deeply embedded in our brain’s functioning. But, Kolk notes that when those needs aren’t met [no one comes to our aid or is available to help], we move towards the “flight or fight” reaction to trauma. [Others have added freeze] Fighting or fleeing are legitimate biblical reactions to an unsafe individual (toxic boss for instance).

We see examples of both responses by historical characters in the Bible, often approved of by the writers.

Remember the Apostle Paul being let down off the city wall to escape those who were seeking his harm as he shared the Gospel.[5] Consider Jesus’ example when he had challenged his hearers and they did not believe, “departed and hid himself from them.”[6]

On the other hand, heroes of the faith have also confronted (fought) the toxicity of others. The most extraordinary examples come from Jesus as He not only got to safety in some instances, but in some went up against leaders head-on. He challenged their toxicity in many clever ways including simply asking them questions.[7]

Fight or Flight

Much more needs to be said regarding the question of “fight or flight” responses. In my own study of those who have faced toxic leaders, there is a mixture of how effective either of these responses were. One individual who has commented on this blog noted his need to leave two particular toxic leaders – what I would classify as “flight.”

Most of those I have interviewed would agree with this particular response as bringing the most safety and room for healing from the trauma created by abusive leadership.

Since writing this blog in 2017, I have heard more about “freezing” which also has biblical precedent in Tamar’s story (2 Sam. 13]. The next in this series of blogs discusses healing.

Tell us your experiences of seeking the aid of others, fighting, freezing, or fleeing toxicity in your Christian organization.

NOTES:

[1] Psalm 139:14.

[2] Isaiah 65:17, 2 Peter 3:13.

[3] Bessel van der Kolk MD, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, 1st ed. (New York: Penguin Books, 2014), Kindle Location 1705-1707.

[4] Ibid., Kindle Locations 1598-1601.

[5] Acts 9:23-25 says, “When many days had passed, the Jews plotted to kill [Paul], but their plot became known to [Paul]. They were watching the gates day and night in order to kill him, but his disciples took him by night and let him down through an opening in the wall, lowering him in a basket.”

[6] John 12:36.

[7] In Matthew 15, Jesus responds to the Pharisees’ questions with his own questions, cleverly turning their arguments in on themselves.

Trauma by Swine: Steven’s Story

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Note: This blog is the first in a series exploring ways those who have been traumatized by toxic leaders can find healing in Christ’s love through the church. This post was originally published in 2017.

When Steven[1] joined a large Christian parachurch organization he was excited to be in an influential position to spread God’s Word. The organization needed the gifts God had given him as a visionary, network-building leader. He had successfully led other organizations and was not looking for another job when approached.

But, the enticement of using his God-given gifts to rebuild a ministry overcame the attractive comforts of staying in his current position.

He was warned that the organization was “dysfunctional” and it only took a short time for the dysfunction to catch up to him. The chairman of the board of directors was exceedingly controlling and did not seem to appreciate the new leader’s successes. Steven was fired unceremoniously after little or no discussion as to why a few short months after being “headhunted” by the organization.

Steven said he went through all the stages of grief and was “talking about the story more than [he] wanted to.” Diana Langberg, a Christian psychiatrist who has worked extensively with those who have experienced trauma says this is very common. She says,

“When people have been traumatized, they repeat things over and over, trying to grasp what cannot be understood and trying to carry what is unbearable.”[2]

According to Langberg, it is an important part of the healing process for many to continually speak of the pain. The processing involved in repeating the story in many different ways provides clarity over time as the traumatized extract themselves from the emotional abuse they have suffered.

As we conversed about his experience, Steven said, “I realized in a sense I had to talk about it. I had to tell the story in order to gain mastery over it. Otherwise it was inside of me and it didn’t make sense.” This is true of many employees of Christian organizations with whom I have spoken. Mark, a faculty member of a Christian college under abusive leadership, said he and his wife found much healing by meeting with a church group that listened to them “without judging.”

However, it is often difficult for others to hear the same stories “over and over again.” This seemed true for our own friends who struggled to hear our stories when we returned from the mission field. Sometimes their eyes glazed over or they made judgmental comments. Suggestions were made intending to move us beyond our apparent rut of anger, disappointment, and shame.

One woman, traumatized by emotional abuse in her home, said much the same thing. She believes people just don’t want to hear the stories and she doesn’t want to bore them.

Weep With Those Who Weep

The Apostle Paul, on the other hand, calls the church to “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”[3]

Do we have the patience to weep with our brothers as they pour out their pain to us over and over again? Maybe if we recognize this as part of God’s means for healing His children, we will take the long view and allow ourselves to be inconvenienced.

God has created our brains in such a way that we can “empathize” with others. As explained by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, a specialist in diagnosis and treatment of trauma, there are “mirror” neurons in the frontal lobe that make it possible to “pick up not only another person’s movement but her emotional state and intentions as well. When people are in sync with each other, they tend to stand or sit similar ways, and their voices take on the same rhythms.”[4]

Kolk goes on to say trauma itself usually involves “not being seen, not being mirrored, and not being taken into account.”[5] Trauma is brought on by others who do not care for the person they are hurting. They have no concern for the feelings of others.

As abusers or possibly Narcissists, they are really only concerned about their own comforts and power. Many abusive individuals will strongly maintain they “love” the one they abuse, but their controlling and demeaning behavior is not Jesus’ kind of love.

Mirroring

For healing to take place, the traumatized person must regain the ability to safely “mirror” (empathize with) others and be mirrored by others, according to Kolk.[6] They must salvage their ability to trust others in relationships both in sharing their own hurts and hearing the distresses of others.

How do the traumatized begin to trust again? Having been so deeply wounded by another human being, how does a person, who joined a Christian organization thinking they would minister “together” with a brother in Christ, regain the capacity to trust others?

NOTES:

[1] Not his real name. All the names in this blog have been changed to protect their identities.

[2] Diane Langberg, Suffering and the Heart of God: How Trauma Destroys and Christ Restores, (Greensboro, NC: New Growth Press, 2015), 79.

[3] Romans 12:15.

[4] Bessel van der Kolk MD, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, (New York: Penguin Books, 2014), locations 1200–1202.

[5] Ibid., 1204.

[6] Ibid., 1203.