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22 Years of Failure: The Church’s Response to Abuse

June 15, 2020April 9, 2026 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

Marsha sought help from church leaders for 22 years. They didn't think that was long enough to live with an abusive husband. The church's theology of divorce is hurtful and unbiblical.

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Daniel in the Lion’s Den: A Leadership Quagmire

April 17, 2020July 19, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / 1 Comment

Daniel lost his job, but as he noted, "The real abuse was not in being fired unjustly [which he was], but in [Pastor Jim] having to control the narrative in every situation...the manipulation, gas lighting, and his constant need to fight."

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Amelia and Ethan: Reading the Signs

October 25, 2019March 17, 2026 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

Ethan said there were red flags he should have seen, and to this day, several years later, lives with a certain guilt that he failed in his calling.

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Like a Shepherd Lead Us: Looking Outward

August 12, 2019November 11, 2024 / pearlsandswinesite / Leave a comment

All Christian leadership should look like shepherding. A shepherd who looks out for his sheep.

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Stories of Matthew 18 Under a Toxic Boss

June 15, 2018January 27, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / 5 Comments

The fruit of interviews with employees who sought diligently to respond to their foul bosses in biblical and thoughtful ways.

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What’s Their Problem: Diagnosing Toxic Leaders

November 24, 2017January 12, 2026 / pearlsandswinesite / 5 Comments

Have you wondered why your boss acts the way he does? This is a study of personality disorders and other behavioral problems toxic leaders commonly have.

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Toxic Personalities: Disorders and Other Such Rot

November 24, 2017April 10, 2025 / pearlsandswinesite / 3 Comments

As my wife and I began to experience a particularly toxic boss, we had little understanding of how someone could be incredibly malicious in one moment and act like our best friend soon after. One moment Betty was yelling at my wife and that evening she was all charm and sweetness.

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Submission and the Harsh Boss: 1 Peter 2:18

November 15, 2017January 7, 2026 / pearlsandswinesite / 6 Comments

In my own experience with toxic leaders, it was common to hear 1 Peter 2:18 quoted or paraphrased by those who wished to protect the authority of leaders.

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