This blog is written for people like me.
The Lord gives us all spheres of influence. Family. Friends. Work. Church. Organizations.
And, as a result of the Fall of man into sin, we have an ego to match.
We want the respect of people. At least some of us do. We want to know we are needed. Our insecurities can drive us to new heights of self-defense. Often that defense is in putting on a good show—making our outward image as squeaky clean as possible for the watching world, while rotting away inside.
We see this in Jesus’ critique of the scribes and Pharisees.
“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness. 28 So you also outwardly appear righteous to others, but within you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness.”
Matthew 23:27-28 (ESV)
One of the ways that a toxic leader can be identified is by simply observing those self-defense mechanisms – how hard is he or she trying to keep up an image?
And at times, one of those mechanisms is found in their rabid hold on titles.
I was raised in a family that was very keyed into college degrees. In general, I would suggest the drive was not so much for egotistical purposes but from the belief that it was the means for being the best person you could be.
However, those degrees can become a foundation for arrogance and in the end toxic leadership that feeds on them.
Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples,
“The scribes and the Pharisees sit on Moses’ seat, 3 so do and observe whatever they tell you, but not the works they do. For they preach, but do not practice. 4 They tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to move them with their finger. 5 They do all their deeds to be seen by others. For they make their phylacteries broad and their fringes long, 6 and they love the place of honor at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues 7 and greetings in the marketplaces and being called rabbi by others. 8 But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brothers. 9 And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. 10 Neither be called instructors, for you have one instructor, the Christ. 11 The greatest among you shall be your servant. 12 Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.
Matthew 23:2-12 (ESV)
There are several criticisms that Jesus has for the scribes and the Pharisees:
- Hypocricy
They say one thing and do another Jesus says. “They preach, but do not practice.” This is true of all people. It is why Jesus died . . . to save sinners like us. However, the Pharisees were unrepentant hypocrites on steroids.
- Legalism
The Pharisees expected others to follow all their unbiblical or additional rules for godly living but did not practice those rules themselves. Just the laying these burdens on others was wicked. But, the hypocricy of failing to practice the rules themselves was double the evil.
- Keeping Up the Image
They looked good. They put on the clothing of importance. You see, that’s the easy part. It takes little trouble to look good on the outside, throwing on a nice looking uniform, tie, and saying nice things to others (in the presence of others).
But note the motive – “To be seen by others.” Not to serve Christ. Not to love neighbor. But to be “seen” as good or important.
- Titles
The “Rabbi” was an important and respected position in their community. Strong’s Dictionary says this title means, “my great one, my honourable sir.” or “Master.” Wow.
Pretty big deal.
Titles are Important, But . . .
Titles are helpful for a couple different reasons:
- They establish lines of authority. With titles we know who is in charge in the organization. It provides a job description.
- And, they help us know the amount of training an individual has had in a particular area of expertise.
Those reasons are good reasons. Fine. Useful.
However, what Jesus gets at in his scathing criticism of the Pharisees from which we want to learn is that motive matters. The heart matters.
Why do I want to be called Dr.? Why do I desire my subordinates to call me Mr. or CEO? Why does it make me uncomfortable when a parishoner doesn’t call me Pastor?
What is driving my need to sit in a particular seat at the table?
A Little Story
When my family was working for a mission in Africa, my wife was invited along with several other women with the mission to a seminar presented by a diplomat’s wife. The seminar was on social etiquette. Having put on numerous state dinners and the like, this woman presented a variety of things that are expected of those hosting important people.
It included how the host should seat people at the table for dinner. Who is on the right hand of the host, who at the end of the table, etc.
My wife and her fellow missionaries were rather amused by it all. However, our mission Director’s wife took it all in. When we were invited to their home for dinner along with the U.S. Ambassador to the country, she sat us according to these etiquette rules.
After the Director’s wife sat us, the Ambassador said, “I see you know the correct etiquette.”
Jesus’ words about seeking the head of the table and desiring to be noticed and held up as important came flooding to my mind.
As it turned out, image, place of importance, titles . . . all of that, was very important to our mission leaders. And they were toxic.
Do We Reject Titles?
The question for us is do we reject titles all together? It should be apparent that titles themselves are not wrong. It is what lurks underneath that we must consider and of which to be aware.
Why do I want others to know my title? Is it driven by ego? Or is it to provide context for my work that others know my qualifications.
Is it to run roughshod over those under my authority in the church, organization, business, or home? Or is it to clarify my position in the organization as a servant to my subordinates? And then seek to live up to the title with integrity and good character?
The answer to those questions will largely determine yours and my own toxicity. Beware. Writing this has given me an opportunity to take a bit of a dive into my heart.
I hope that it will be helpful to your heart transformation as you seek to be a godly influence in the spheres God has given you.